booooiiiing

 My new small animal trap was set and sprung

    Unfortunately, Beth was the animal springing the trap.  She decided to investigate and stuck her nose in it, springing it .

    She was not hurt.  But I will wait until tonight to reset it.

    Not to bore you, but I had a miserable night sleeping.

    But that is not what I am going to talk about.

    It was a dream I had.

    I was in a play.  I was not a major character, but I had three different characters in the show.

    When it was my time to go on as my first character, the chaos began.  I forgot my lines, started saying crazy stuff, and ended up walking around the stage in my tighty whiteys.  (Notice, Emily?  Tighty!). It was almost like an episode on Only Murders in the Building called the White Room.....but we just watched it tonight, and the dream was last night.

    I then went off back stage and tried to find my script.  But I could not.  People kept going on and off the stage but nothing was making sense.

    TC was there and I asked him when my fortune teller character went on and he said it didn't, because I ended the play.  The 2 hour show took 40 minutes.

    The huge cast went out for the curtain call and the audience gave us a standing ovation!  I kept yelling, "No, I ruined it.  Come back tomorrow to see the real show."  But they kept applauding.

    I went to each cast member and apologized and now it gets weird.  Almost every person I have performed with over the past 40 years seemed to be in the cast.  I saw faces of people I have not seen in years, faces of people whose names I don't remember but whose faces I do, faces of people I have not even thought of in years.

    And the audience.  The audience was people I knew.  Friends, neighbors, relatives, former students, co-workers, everyone I ever met, it seemed.   They just kept applauding.

    As I apologized  to people, they would say, "It's ok.  You're going to be all right."

    And I started crying.

    Not just in my dream, I woke up sobbing away.

    I've done a lot of self analysis.  My forgetting lines is my fear of developing Alzheimers.  Seeing all the cast members and audience cheering me is my fear of death, the pain of saying good bye.  

    Appearing on stage in my tighty whiteys is just because I am weird.

    I think Buffett's death is in there somewhere too.  I had a great times with people at the show, and I fear those great times over.  I will miss that experience as much as I will miss the music.

    Hopefully I will sleep tonight.  I am tired.  I did not take a nap.  I did some physical stuff, well, sorta.  I mowed the front lawn.  On my riding lawn mower.  So, I guess I really didn't do any physical stuff except eat.

Peace and Love