maybe some lemondade is on tap

I need to be more positive

     I have been a little dark lately.....so I am turning it around.
     Instead of three days without Internet, TV and phone, I am looking at three days of using my time to read, work my crossword, and do yard work.
     And yard work did get done today.  I mowed.  Rolled my yard.  Aerated my yard.  Over seeded the yard.  Tomorrow morning I am going to get up early (which is sometime before 10) and fertilize it    before going to work.
     Yes, work!  I am subbing in my old room tomorrow.  When they get near the bottom of the barrel for subs, they call me.  I don't mind doing afternoons, and am especially happy to do this one.  In fact, I am always happy to sub for a happy reason....like the closing on the sale of a house.
     Even the lack of progress in the yard didn't bum me out so much.
     In fact, I am turning those lemons into lemonade.
     For $5 I will give you a tour of the seven wonders of the world!
     Yes, that is right.  For a measly $5 I will take you on a guided tour of some of the world's most amazing sites.
     You'll see the great Unfinished Wall of Dickowdom.  China may have a bigger one, but my wall is unique in many ways.
     We'll stop off at the Great Sands of the Unpatio.  Sure, there are bigger sand dunes, and sand beaches, and sand hills.....but this hill will impress you for the huge amount of vegetation present.
Forget the Grand Canyon, come step over Canyon Where In The Hell Did This Come From?  Learn about the proper location of drainage tubes to minimise washouts.
     Ever wanted to see the Hanging Gardens of Babylon?  See my Hanging Gardens of Cucumbers instead.  You may even arrive in time to see the 14 inch yellow cucumber hanging on to its scraggly vine!  Truly a treat for the eyes!!
     No doubt you have read about the holes in Siberia.  Well, my tour will take you to several holes that have appeared in the past six months.  There is no dirt around the holes, so my guess is I have a rare earth eating animal previously unknown to the annals of science.
     At the end of your tour you will have a chance to relax and share a glass of wine with me, Terry, the friendly tour operator.
Who knows, this could be the highlight of your fall vacation travels.
Don't call now, because I still don't have phone, Internet or cable.  I am using Emily's WIFI....and instead of sitting in the car in her driveway, I am actually in her house.
See....I can do it!  Positives galore!!!