snow daze

I used to get excited for snow

    All you teachers and former teachers will understand.
     A heavy snowfall meant no school.  A day to sit in, relax in front of the fire, read, snack at will.....
     But now, everyday is a snow day.
     One time, years ago, it had snowed and snowed a lot.  We lived on Skare Court and I always listened to WRHL when the first flakes hit.
     This was a morning that I might have needed to go in a little early to "finish up" lesson plans for the day.
     I waited until after 7, and no closing, so I drove in.
     This was in the pre cell phone days.
     It took my half an hour to get in....and when I got there, I was the only car in the lot!
     I went in and called home......the radio had announced no school just as I was pulling out of the driveway.
     So I sat there for a while, answering the phone and telling people there was no school.  I think the custodian eventually showed up.
     Years before I started teaching I worked at the newspaper.  I was in the Oregon office of The Life.       We didn't have a lot of money, and we needed two cars.
      So I bought a beater.  This car didn't have a heat, but the radio worked.
      It didn't have snow tires, but I bought some tire chains to put on for a heavy snow.
     The day finally came when I had to get to Oregon, there was a lot of snow, and I put on the chains.
     I had no idea how these were put on, but I put them on and started driving.
    There was a  "whump, whump, whump" noise all the way over.  I had to turn the radio up full blast  to drown out the noise.
     When I parked in Oregon, I got out and discovered I didn't have any wheel wells left....the chains had beaten the crap out of them.  I guess I was supposed to shorten them.
     Another time I made Jackie drive it and she came to the newspaper office and threw the keys at me.  We were living on Southview Drive, and she drove from there to the office at North Main and Fourth Avenue looking out the window in sub zero temps because not only did the heater not work, the defroster didn't either.  She wanted her car to drive instead, so she could see and be warm.
     Ah yes, snow brings back such fond memories.
     Glad I am retired.

got a lot of watchin to do

I need to see some movies

     I have seen Bridge of Spies and The Martian, but I want to see Inside Out and Spotlight.  I am uncertain about the Revenant, or however you spell it.
     Movies with a lot of blood and gore don't sit well with me.
     Every year I say I am going to watch the Oscar nominated films before the Oscars, but I never do.  I still have not seen last year's!
     I thought Chris Rock did a good job at chiding the nominating process and Hollywood in general.
And I loved the Girl Scout cookie sale....over $60,000 raised, which is not amazing considering all the money in the room.
      The guy who commented on best documentary was funny too.
      So, while the awards are still on going, I am a little disinterested.  I will jump back in front of the tv when they hit best actor, actress and movie.....but it loses a little luster when you have not seen the movies.
     And again, I wonder where to see the short films and documentaries....maybe Netflix will have them.
     Lady Gaga was amazing.... and the message so strong.  Hope it makes a difference.
      I don't know what happened today.  It just disappeared.  Figuratively, of course.
      I learned how to use my I Phone and Jackie's old I Pad.  I will be taking them along when I go away, and Emily and John came over to show me how to use them.
     Talked to Julia, who is recovering from a case of pneumonia.  I should have taken that chicken soup to her!  She sounds better, but not great.
     I did a funny thing yesterday, for the second time.  MK and S were over and we played a little euchre.  As they were leaving, they smelled a funny smell in the garage.  I did too.
     Seems someone hit one of the on buttons on the gas grill and the burner was on.  I said before I was always going to turn off the gas at the tank to avoid that.  Well, I did not learn.
     Lucky I don't smoke....that may have been interesting.
     In fact, I may have gotten a bang out of the whole night!
     Awards...still going.
     Unlike me.

roller coaster time

I just listened to the weather forecast
  
     I could have sworn they said a high of 55 tomorrow and a low of 20 tomorrow night.
     That is a roller coaster!
     And snow midweek....maybe an inch or four.  Who knows?
     A butterfly farts in Australia and it changes our weather pattern.
     Weather forecasting would be a great job to have.  You get it wrong like98 per cent of the time and people still tune in to listen!  amazing.
     If baseball umpires were as accurate, it would be chaos on the field.
     Too many times I have carried and umbrella when it's sunny and not carried it in a downpour.
     I've stocked the shelves for a winter storm only to be eating soup for the next two weeks.  Not that I don't like soup....I do.  I like blizzards too.
     So I go to bed tonight with a little vino in my bod and a hope for warm temperatures tomorrow.     Yes, it will be windy so don't drive next to a semi.
     But before I do turn in, I am going to take a moment to say a little prayer for Steve and his family.
     Even if you don't know who I am talking about, just put a good word in for him tonight.
    Peace and love.

a quiet night

I am giving a little pause tonight

     I hate when friends hurt and I am powerless to do anything about it.
     I have several friends facing health or relationship issues.  I care for them all, but I can't help.
     Life takes quick and unexpected turns.
     Live life.  Hug your family.  Don't take anything for granted.

I'm so tired

I am feeling very tired tonight

     What makes me so tired?  I know you are wanting to ask that.
     So here goes.
     I am tired of hearing presidential candidates waste hours insulting their opposition and the American public.  Tell us what you are going to do.  Be specific.  Round up 11 million people?  How??
     I am tired of hearing about mass shootings.  Something is wrong with a country that allow this to continue to happen.
     I am tired of both parties in Springfield posturing.  You were elected to run the state.  Run it.  Don't ruin it.
     I am tired of cold, snowy weather.  I need warmth and sunshine.
     I am tired of walking.  I need to ride my bike this weekends.
    I am tired of car commercials where the driver goes fast to impress us all on the amount of power under the hood.  We have speed limits in this country.  Try being responsible for a change.
     I am tired of lobbyists and special interest groups spending huge amounts of money to buy their candidate an office.  Not the American way.
     I am tired of seeing older men in sweatpants.  You don't look good.  Unless you are in a gym or exercising or having surgery, don't wear them in public.
     Ditto for pajamas.
     I'm tired of not being able to walk around in my garage.
     I'm tired of always having one extra sock when I do laundry.  You would think I would have a pair every other load, but by the time a second load gets washed, the first sock has run away.
     I'm tired of tieing shoes.
     I am tired of wearing a hat.  But if I don't, I just get colder.
     I'm tired of spending money.  It's not fun anymore.
     I'm tired of heartburn.
     I'm tired of not hearing from people when I send them a great free lance article.
     I'm tired of drinking wine.
     Nope, scratch that...I lied on the last one.

false hopes

I have not finished by book goal

     I planned to read all the Donna Leon books, featuring Guido Brunetti as the chief detective, during my hernia repair recovery time.
     But I am a little behind.  (Some people do call me a little ass, but it does not mean the same thing._
     I am only on book 9 of the 22 book series.
     I have been using the inter library loan option and have been able to get books from Kankakee, Joliet, DeKalb, Lockport and other towns.  Plus I have a few to round out the series.
   But I hit a roadblock today.
    I ordered Friends in High Places but when I got the book, it wasn't a Donna Leon.  It seems there are multiple Friends in High Places by different authors.  The one I want doesn't seem to be at any library, so I spent $12 and ordered it from Barnes and Noble.
     Oh well.  I have spent a lot of money lately, and some of it even made sense.
     I love the books and found a web site with a map of Venice, where the stories take place.
     I can almost picture walking down she narrow streets, seeing the dirty waters of the canals, watching the tourists in San Marco square.  Eating gelatto from a small stand.
     Ahhh.........  The travel bug has bitten me.  I must obey.
     Speaking of bugs, we have little black bugs buzzing around.  At first I thought they were coming from my incision......just joking.
     I don't know where they came from...maybe the poinsettia?
     At first I thought they were floaters in my eyes, but Jackie has seen them also.
     Such is life.
     I seem to be floating off to sleep right now.......

cost of doin' business

I bought a new printer cartridge

     I know...big whoop ti do.
     I have an older model HP printer.  It takes a black ribbon and a color ribbon.
     The black always runs out faster.
     I used to be able to buy a package of both for cheaper than buying two individuals.  I can't seem to find the package of two anymore.
     So I buy one cartridge at a time.
     My black cartridge costs $46.
     The colored one is $48, so I did not buy one.
     I can get a new printer for less than $100.
     The printer is two computers old.  So it is probably about 10 years old, and they are no longer selling the ribbons in large numbers.  Office Max does not even stock them.
     I can order them on line, but they are no cheaper than going to Wallyworld and buying them there.      I brought my new cartridge home and put it in....and it seems I need a color one too.
     So here is my dilemma:  do I buy a new printer, which uses much less costly ink refills, or continue to use my perfectly good but expensive cartridge consuming printer?  If I buy a new printer, how do I know it will be compatible with my 6 year old I Mac?  Why do I print stuff anyway?  Will the airlines accept my ticket if it is really printed in bizarro color?  Do I risk it?
     All these questions loom in my mind tonight.
     Topping it off, I was in my HUB volunteer mode today when one of the kids mentioned old people.
     "Hey, be careful when you talk about old people," I said.
     This little girl said, "I don't mean you Mr. D.  I mean people who are 70....now that's old."
     I looked at her and said, "You know, I am almost 68."
     Without missing a beat she said, "Ok, then 75.  They are really old."
     Another reminder that life is to be lived.

ha, ha, ha........

Here's a few of my favorite things




     Reflecting back to the James Burrows special, I got to thinking of the funny moments I remember from tv shows.
Here are 10 of my favorites......maybe in order, maybe not.

     Jim Ignatowski taking the driver's test in Taxi.  He wants to know what a yellow light means.  they try to explain....but to no avail.
     The Thanksgiving turkey drop on WKRP.  I still laugh when Les Nessman does his live report.  And when Mr. Carlson comes out of his office and says, "As god is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly."
     Barney Miller, when Wojo's girlfriend makes marijuana laced brownies and Wojo brings them to the precinct.  Fish eats some and captures a criminal.  The bad guy is sitting at a desk and is in awe that the old guy could actually leap from building to building.
    When Raj meets a girl in the coffee shop and he takes off all his clothes in a Big Bang episode.
     Lucy and the chocolates.
     Lucy and the vegavitaminamin commercial.
     Johnny Carson with the Ed Ames tomahawk throw.
     Johnny Carson and the interview with the lady who collected oddly shaped potoato chips.
     The old Bob Newhart show when he drunkenly orders moo goo gai pan.
     Friends, when Ross gets attacked by the cat and you follow all the excitement from inside the apartment, with Ross on the balcony.
     Any thing with Tim Conway on the Carol Burnett show, but especially the elephant bit.  I listed this, but it can't be one of my top ten because I think I have only seen it on U Tube.

     So, those are mine.
     Feel free to tell what you found funny on a tv show....I know I missed a lot!

Lassie...Timmy's in the well!!??

I got a scare tonight

     I was downstairs watching a movie and Jackie was upstairs watching a special.
     The family that watches tv together, sometimes gets board with choices.
     I was in the middle of Philomena when I heard this screaming from upstairs.  Corki was with me (of course) and heard it too.
     We both raced upstairs, me expecting to have to pick up Jackie.
     There she was, sitting in a chair, laughing hysterically at the tv show.
     It was a special on James Burrows, who has now directed 1,000 episodes in a 40 year career.
     Jackie was laughing at the scene from Taxi where Jim Ignatowski is trying to pass the driver's test and Alex and the crew try to help him.
     "What does a yellow light mean?"
     If you have never scene it, it has to be on U Tube.  Everything else is.
     I finished my movie and watched the last 5 minutes of the special and realized how special this director is and how much he has been in our lives.
     Mary Tyler Moore Show, Taxi, Cheers, Frasier, Big Bang, Mike and Molly, Friends ... and so many more that have provided me with so many laughs.
     And the great character actors....Danny Devito, Ted Danson, Rhea Pearlman,  Mary Tyler Moore, David Hyde Pierce, Kelsey Grammer,  all come to mind.
     And the characters.... Norm, Jim Ignatowski, Bing, Alex, Cliff, Niles, Frasier, Mary, Sheldon.... the list goes on.
     Watching the ending I sort of regretted not seeing the whole show, just to visit with friends that have been a part of my life.
     By the way, Philomena was a heck of a great story too.

what the hell......

Sometimes things are just NOT my fault

     I just can't figure out whose fault it is.
     For instance, wifey could be blamed because she likes 1 per cent milk.
     Local stores can be blamed because they don't seem to stock Dean's 1 per cent.
     Yes, a large retail pharmacy chain does carry it..... but there have been times the milk is set to be out of best sell by date within one or two days of purchase.  We take about a week, if not more, to go through a half gallon.  We are not big milk drinkers.
    So we were out of milk this morning.  We had a trip to DeKalb to get a present.  I said we could stop at that fairly new supermarket out on Sycamore Road and get one half gallon of milk.
     I went into the store and as an impulsive mood hit me, I picked up a bottle of red wine, a kind Eric used to sell at The Rouge.
     Renee becomes part of the problem by sharing a link that talked about Parmesan cheese being supplemented with a cellulose product used to prevent clotting.  We like the stuff in the green plastic container, which has 7.8 percent cellulose.  This cellulose is in the form of wood fiber.  In other words, sawdust.  My favorite cheese has sawdust in it.  Until reading that article, I was happy in my ignorance.    Jewel recently pulled a product off the market because it has something like 11 per cent sawdust.
     I picked up some medium cheddar cheese.  This is because every time I go to the store and Jackie asks for cheese she specifies medium.  And then I go and buy mild.  I figured as long as it was on my mind, buy the medium.
    Then I realized I was almost out of my new love it cheese Havarti, so I picked up a small pack of that.
    That's when I noticed the hard chunks of Parmesan.  I decided then and there I was not going to eat all that sawdust, so I picked up a chuck of Italian Parmesan cheese.
     I went to the express lane and laid down my bottle of wine, Havarti cheese, medium cheddar, one half gallon of milk and my chunk of Parmesan.  My bill was $32.
     I figured I misread the wine, it must have been more than I read.  I do that often.
     As I was walking out to the car I looked at my receipt.
             wine.....$10;  milk.....$2.25      medium cheddar....... $2.50     Havarti.... $5
                         Parmesan....$14.89

     What the hell???
     I bought cheese that was $18 a pound!!!
     I didn't want to buy New York Strips because they were $16, but I bought a cheese that was $18.  A pound!!
     I started laughing.  Almost uncontrollable laughter.  People were looking at me as I walked out of the store.
      When I got to the car Jackie asked me what was so funny and how come I spent so much money (she gets notified on her cell phone whenever we use our debit card) when I just went in for milk?
     So I just gave her the receipt and said, "Read it."
     I won't use her exact wording, but it was something along the line of "Holy excrement! Was your gray matter engaged at all in a cognitive process?"
     At that point I could have taken it back and pleaded insanity or stupidity.
     But I didn't.
     Who knows, maybe it will give me a greater appreciation for the $3 stuff in a can.

weirdness

Today was just a weird day

    I think the wind was a big part of that.  Semis blown over on 39.  The house rattling all day and all night.
     I went to the website of my author friend from yesterday's post.  The website took me to someone who does not look anything like the guy I know!  Yet, I found the site interesting and helpful to me.   So.. what is that word?  Serendipity.
     I went to walk inside at the exercise place.
     One of the perks of my health insurance is the Silver Sneakers program.  I can enroll at a gym recognized by my health care provider and work out for free.  My membership is billed on a daily basis to the insurance company.
     The fools think that will spurn someone like me to actually get off their fat butt and do something constructive, besides eat cookies and chocolate and play solitaire.
     Occasionally I get a bur under my saddle.  So I have gone several times in the past two weeks, walking about 1.5 miles almost each time.
     Once I forgot my key fob and went home.  Thursday I forgot my key fob but walked anyway.
     Today I remembered my key fob, but forgot my shoes.
     I seem to go there and not walk as often as I go there and walk.
     I filled my van up for 99 cents a gallon Wednesday.  That's why I didn't have my shoes today.
     I drove her van Wednesday because it was low on gas.  I use a rewards card and had 55 cents on it.  I filled the van for .99 a gallon.....or $15 and change total.  Reminded me of the good old days.
     Thursday I drove her to a library meeting and went to walk.  Put my shoes in the van.
     Today I drove my car and ...... no shoes.
     Maybe tomorrow.
     I just have to make sure I have the right shoes, the right car, the right frame of mind....
     Time will tell.

small world

I just ran into an old friend

    Let me clarify that.  Not actually a friend.  And I didn't exactly run into him.
    I was in the fifth grade Hub program class Tuesday  and was just browsing through the paperbacks in the room, seeing if there were any titles I recognized.
     I found a book:  Candy Bomber, the Story of the Berlin Airlift's "Chocolate Pilot."
it was written by Michael Tunnell.  I had him for a class at NIU when I started working on my master degree in education.
     It was a children's literature class and he introduced me to some amazing authors.
     I think I may have eventually discovered them on my own, but in his class I met them.
     Lloyd Alexander, the reclusive author of the Prydain series.  He lived in near or in Philadelphia and always welcomed school groups and visitors in his home.  We did a conference call with him in class and were able to talk to the author, who won a Newberry Award years ago.  The Prydain series was fantasy, long before Harry Potter made fantasy popular.
     Book of Three, Black Cauldron, High King, Taran Wanderer, Castle of Llyr..... all good reads for people who believe in oracular pigs and good triumphing over evil.
     We had to read X number of books for the class.  I found Great Gilly Hopkins, which is one of my all time favorite books.  A scrawny pain in the butt delinquent who wants nothing but to go back to her mother.  Not all books have happy endings, even if it means getting your wish.  That led me to other Kathryn Patterson books, like Bridge to Terabithia...... great reads.
     And Judy Blume, of course.
     Truthfully, that is one thing I miss about teaching.... sharing books with youngsters and reading books written for youngsters.  Their messages are so simple, and yet so telling.
     The year my brother died I read Tuck Everlasting, about a family that could not die.  Actually, i think I read Tuck every year.  But that year is was a pretty powerful personal message I got.  People die.  It's part of the circle of life.
     The Tucks could not die and Winnie Foster was the only person who knew the secret.  When Mae Tuck is arrested for a crime, and sentenced to die by hanging, Winnie sneaks out of the house and helps her escape, thus preserving the secret.
     But the question is if Winnie will reveal the spring with the magical waters that the Tucks drank.  When the Tucks come back in 70 years, they learn the answer.
     It's a book about the value of death.  And loyalty.  And love.
     I could go on about Walk Two Moons, Where the Red Fern Grows, the Chronicles of Narnia......but you don't have enough time to read all I could say about them.
     There is a contact info page in this book.  I think I'll drop the author a note and tell him thanks..... belatedly.... for bringing kids lit to life for me.
     And thanks for telling the story of the Candy Bomber.

change is not always good

We switched over to Xfinity

     We have a new dvr box and a new remote.
     The remote is very neat.  It works even if pointed away from the tv.  Multi directional, I believe is how they described it.
     And it has a voice activated option.  Push the button, hold it down and say the channel and bingo, it goes to that channel.
     Problem is, someone was using it the other night and activated the voice system.  So we will be watching a show and in the middle of the show a deep throated, very sexy woman, says totally weird things like, "Scandal, 33 minutes remaining."
     No one has touched the remote.  It just starts talking.
     It also talks when you go through the guide and stops on a channel.  "Big Bang Theory, 16 minutes left."
     It's highly annoying.
     At some point, we are going to have to figure out how to deactivate the sexy annoying voice.  It is terrible when you go to the menu and list your recordings.  It starts to tell you about the recording, which arrow to hit, which direction to go, which channel it is on....... drives me nuts.
     I pine (always wanted to use pine in a sentence that made sense) for the old days, when you had to get up and select one of the four channels you wanted to watch.  The days when a tv guide in the newspaper didn't take up half a page.  The days when I could watch WGN.  The days when my tv did not speak to me.
     But as Bob Dylan so aptly noted, "The times, they are a changin."
     I just wish I could keep up.

I predict....

I am becoming a fortune teller

     I can predict things.  Sometimes they come true.
     For example, I predict I will not get all the things done on my list by summer.  I can tell.  I have wasted the last couple of days when I should have been doing something.
     Well, wasted Monday anyway.  And Sunday, except I got caught up with Downton Abbey so I guess that was not a waste.
     I love the show.  There is something about period pieces I love more than modern shows.  Same as when I watch the Poirot shows, it is the olden times that capture my attention.
     In Downtown, at the very beginning they show a servant using a ruler to be sure the knives, forks and spoons are at the correct distances from the plates.  I'm lucky if I remember the silverware as I balance my food on my lap in front of the tv.
     Yes, there is a plot line....but I enjoy looking at the old cars, the ancient rooms, the grand estates.
     I think I was born too late and of the wrong class.
     I would like to go to Highclere Castle, which is the real Downton Abbey.  The owners do open it for tours on a regular basis because they need the money to keep the place operating.
     I honestly can't imagine the lifestyle the upper class led...the Earls, Lords and Ladies.  The way they just naturally assume people are there to serve them, and the way the servants feel there is no other way to live.
     I have to say my favorite character is Mr. Carson, the butler.  Just the way he moves fascinates me.  And that voice.........amazing.
     Anyway, here are some other predictions:
     I won't start to pack until March 12.
     I won't even think about what to take until March 12.
     I will forget to buy mosquito repellent.
     I won't get the basement area cleaned up that I had planned to finish before Julia came home....piles of crap still waiting to be swept into the garbage.
     I will lose 10 pounds before the wedding.  That is a minimum.
     I predict I am going to meet a strong bodied red in the next couple of days......one that will give me a sense of relaxation.
     I do hate to drink alone......just saying.

Oh....... yuck

I have to stop listening to the news

     WGN had a report on tonight about shoes.
     Studies by two universities have found large amounts of bacteria on the bottom of  shoes.  These are the same shoes you wear into your house and track across the floors.
     (Yes, we watched WGN channel 9.  We watch it via the computer and project it onto our tv.  If the narrow minded idiots who ran the Rockford channels and Comcast had any regard for their customers or potential customers, they would fix this so we did not have to jump through all those hoops.)
Highest types?  E coli!!!!!!  Also big, C Diff.    C Diff??? Holy crackers, Batman!!!
     Think about where you wear your shoes.
     If you are a guy and you have ever used a public restroom, you can get an idea.
     What the hell have we done in society?  We have put a man on the moon, developed basketball players who can hit 3 pointers from half a mile away, but we can't get men to actually pee in the urinal without hitting the floor.  As I guy, I am a little disgusted by that.
     Just walking down a street, where people have spit, dogs taken a leak, drunks vomited, and who knows what all else has happened on the sidewalk that you are innocently walking on and you get the idea that the bottom of a shoe is isn't the cleanest place in the world.
     THOSE SIDEWALKS ARE FILTHY!!
     One solution is to have the sanitizing wipes, the ones with bleach, by the door and wipe shoes off before you enter.
     Another solution is to leave your shoes at the door.
     At Julia's, she has friends who have a no shoe policy.  When you go into their house, you take off your shoes and put on the spare slippers or go barefoot.
     When we hiked up to a mountain hut, as soon as we entered there were places to put your shoes and crocs to wear inside.
     Another solution would be to buy those cloth slip ons that Realtors often have.  You leave the shoes on, but protect the people from the spread of bacteria.
     I don't want to offend people, but I don't want to get sick either.  They did say that this could be a problem for people with immune system issues.... like MS, lupus, and other nasty stuff.
     So I am in a quandary.
     Do I ask people to bring slippers?  Do I buy lots of slippers to have on hand, and spray them like they do in a bowling alley when people are done?  Do I get the little shoe covers.
     I am sure wifey will have a big say in any decision we make.
     Until then....treat your shoes like they are germ filled time bombs waiting to infect you.
     After all, they are.

maybe it's a start

I got my desk almost clean

     I organized.
     I hate wasting paper.  So I take paper that has a blank side, cut it in half so I have a 5 by 8 sheet and use those as note papers.  I put a huge clip on the top to hold it all together.
     When I need to make a note, I write on the paper.
     Sometimes I write on the top paper, sometimes I just flip open the pile and write.
     Movies I want to see.  Books I want to read.  Flowers that may do well.  Places to go.  Story ideas.  Blog ideas.
     You get the idea.
     Problem is, when I want to find the note, I have to go through all the pages.  And sometimes the clip comes off and everything spills on the floor.
     I took a spiral bound notebook and divided it into sections.  I put those sticky tabs at the start of each section.
     Then I went through the notes and put them in the right section.
     So on my movie list, I have about 20 movies I intend to see someday.  My book list is a little shorter and my plant list is up to about 12.
     Everything is in one place...in a notebook marked :   "Stuff to keep and refer to over time."  Yes, I know.. .it's a little wordy.
     I hope that helps.
     I am also making sure I know when my meetings are.  I missed a Rotary meeting last Wednesday morning and a museum meeting Thursday.  It was one of those weeks.
Maybe it's not organization.  I also went into the pantry with my dirty dishes.  I realized I was in the wrong place, so I turned around and threw out all the silverware on the plate.  It was supposed to go in the dishwasher.
     It's funny in a way, but I know if it comes to the day when you find the Thanksgiving turkey in the bathroom, it will be time to worry.
     Meantime, the decision is use the snow blower tomorrow or not?  I am on restricted weight lifting, but I can start it and it is self propelled, so I am not lifting or pushing.
     Or, I can just let it melt......53 on Friday.
     I guess Nature knows best.

a world view

I met some nice young people today

     I almost called them kids, but they are not kids.
     I hung around with Rotary exchange students and Rotary Interact kids from RTHS for a couple of hours.
     The exchange students were from the northern part of Illinois, but represented the world.  There were students from Lithuania, Germany, Taiwan,  Italy, Brazil, and I think one of the Scandinavian countries, and maybe the Philippines, and possibly Thailand....but my memory is a little unsure about the last three.
     The Rochelle Rotary Club hosted the event, and local youths spent some time with our guests ice skating by Teen Town, and playing games, eating pizza, and swimming at The Holiday Inn Express.
At least they were able to go swimming, but I left just before then......seemed like a good time to go.  Sorry, Bobbi.
     I talked to the young boy from Lithuania, who was a freshman in high school back home.  He seemed a little reluctant to join the group in games, and was out in the lobby area texting.  He has gone thousands of miles away from family and friends, immersing himself in a new culture with a new language.  I just think its a really daring and brave thing to do.
     He did say the cold didn't bother him...it was just like home.  It occur ed to me I had no idea where Lithuania was, but I knew it was a former Soviet state.  Bobbi found it ..... on the phone.  Amazing, the technology and the help it can be!
     It was funny in that almost everyone at one point was on their phone....probably sharing videos or texting about the old man who just showed up and was asking a lot of questions.
     As a parent I would be a little nervous sending my youngster overseas with no "safety net" to catch them if they stumble.  Yes, the host families do provide that net, but those first days have to be unsettling to a foreign visitor.
     Make no mistake, people overseas hear about the shootings in Chicago and the gun violence that too often occurs in our country.  To many of them, Illinois is Chicago.
     Digression....one year we had a foreign exchange student.  She was here for three weeks.  The Mississippi River had a major flood and her parents called to be sure she was all right.  Sometimes people in Europe have no concept as to the size of the United States.
     The group was splitting into a  boy - girl thing to spend the night in different houses.
     I hope they had a good time today and they have a great year experiencing our country.
     Makes me wish I was a kid again......and knew about programs like this.

baby it's cold

I got to thinking about the weather tonight

    Boy is it going to be cold.
     How cold is it?
     Well, it is so cold......

I saw two icicles jump into a snowbank.
I saw a tree adding an extra layer of bark.
It's a three dog night in bed.
I went outside to spit into the wind and a chunk of hail hit me in the forehead.
Donald Trump changed his stance on climate change.
Ted Cruz decided to go back to Canada,  his homeland, to warm up.
4.879 snowbirds in Florida just put their Illinois homes on the market.
Rauner and Madigan look like friends.
I saw two sun dogs today, and they are trying to get into my garage for the night.
My sidewalk rolled up by itself.
My fart froze in mid air.
I put pants on when I went to get the mail.
I saw two teenagers wearing jackets.
I saw a guy put his tongue on a pole to see if it would freeze.  Stanislas punched him in the face.
Hell, MI, froze over.
Mr. T changed his name to Mr I'm Wearing As Much as I can and I Pity the Fool.
Four drivers had their heads cryogenically preserved while ordering at a Starbucks drive thru.
Instead of frying an egg on the sidewalk, I put out glasses of water and made ice cubes.
     That's all I got.
     Feel free to add your own...which have to be funnier than these!

bully!!

I think the TR show went pretty well

     I heard 75 people showed up for the Apocrypha  of Theodore Roosevelt, the readers' theater show I was in today.
     I was Teddy.  It was a one person show based on a two act play.  We had time constraints, so some editing was done but it was still close to one hour.
     Most of you know how I operate.  Slapdash.  Last Minute, Skin of My Teeth.
     I actually bought a moustache for this show.
     TR had a big, bushy moustache that dominated his face.  I browsed on line and found the perfect moustache.  I ordered it about a month ago.
     I opened it last night.
     It looked like a moustache grown by a 14 year old boy.  It was very thin, very small and did not look like the illustration at all.
      If I had opened it three weeks ago, when I got it, I could have reordered one that was better suited to the former president.
     I wore it, but it was not what I expected.
     However it was made from human hair.  And it was made in Bangladesh.  I don't know if there are health concerns.  I also didn't know there were blond people there.
     In comedy, timing is everything.
     For the past week I have had a scratchy throat.
     Tonight I have a sore throat.  My head hurts.  My body is a little sore.  My ears hurt.
     I have made a nice hot toddy to sooth the throat, and it seems to be doing a remarkable job at soothing the mind also.
     Want to know my retirement fantasy?
     I was going to "be" Teddy Roosevelt and Ben Franklin and do school talks and visits, charging $100 or so for a 40 minute show.  Not a written play, but just tell about their lives, theird accomplishments.  Answer some questions.
     I think it would have been a lot of fun.  And costuming would have been very expensive, although I did think Jackie could have made some of the costume.
     But I can't think of a better way to make history come alive for elementary school youngsters.
    Maybe I should follow Teddy's maxim:  It is better to wear out than rust out.
    Bully!!

and now, a poem

An ode to Theodore Roosevelt


Twas the night before Teddy
and all though my mind
I'm looking for answers
I can't seem to find.

How does he sound,
I've often wondered
I know he talked loud
in fact, often thundered.

But recordings weren't made
in that early media age.
I find the words of TR
only printed on the page.

The script isn't memorized,
of that I am glad.
It's readers theater, so reading
won't make me feel bad.

Why feel bad,
I know you would ask.
I find my mind in old age
isn't up to the task.

Memorizing lines,
a must for a part,
maybe it's me, but
I don't have the heart.

But on with the show,
and Teddy I'll be.
Is it any good?
We'll just wait and see.

I can't eat that

I need to stop reading the news

     I saw a video tonight on a bag of salad greens  that had a huge spider in it, crawling around.
     It was a huntsman spider from Australia, and while the bag and spider were both on that famous country continent, I still am wary.
     Now I won't be able to buy bags of salad to eat during Lent.
     A few weeks ago I saw two articles on bags of bananas bought with black widow spiders in them.       The spiders were alive.
     I can't even walk past the bananas without shaking and keeping a wary eye out.
     When I do pick up a bunch, I shake it for about 2 minutes to knock out any spiders that may be hiding.
     Drinking tap water?
     Not if you have lead pipes coming into your house.
     Breathe the air?
     Not if you live near a smoke belching, carbon emitting manufacturing plant and want to live to a ripe old age.
     The world is a festering germ and pest hotel, waiting for us poor unsuspecting humans to venture into it for respite and rest.  Or is it repast?  I am confused.
     The news is too scary, too frightening, too much of everything.
     And every minor thing is a huge deal.
     Cam Newton doesn't feel happy after a Super Bowl loss and he is criticized.  The biggest game of his life and he didn't play as well as he usually does and he knew it.....no wonder he was sad and depressed.  Yet he is supposed to put on a happy face and pretend the loss didn't figuratively break his heart.
     He's getting more media attention than the refugees dying on beaches in Greece, or the numbers of people who have died from heroin overdoses in the past week.  That's a sad comment on the media.
     Now that was a tangent.
     Anyway, Lent is approaching and I do want to change some things in my life.
     Instead of giving up things, I am going to start doing things....like walking, not looking at Yahoo news, (maybe that's a give up?) watching more cat videos, eating non spidery foods.
     Hopefully in 40 days I can get out of my wilderness.
     And hopefully the world can get out of its wilderness, which is a much bigger mess than mine.
     Time to read.

wondering

I often just wonder

Wonder, not wander.  Although I do wander from time to time.
But wonder.
I wonder where the little brown antique medicine bottle we had at Skare Court went to.
I wonder why I eat so much.
I wonder why my fingernails seem to grow so fast.
I wonder why I can't find spirit gum.
I wonder if my throat is sore, really sore, or just annoying me.
I wonder why I like dark chocolate so much more than milk chocolate.
I wonder why so many people hate.
I wonder if I will ever sort the 3,299 screws, nails, bolts and such I have on my workbench, or if I will just throw them out.
I wonder why I wanted a workbench.
I wonder why light bulbs don't all burn out at the same time.
I wonder why some of our lights have not burned out at all, because I want to replace them but there are four lights in the fixture.
I wonder why spell check on this site is so bizarre.
I wonder why I don't sleep at night.
I wonder where all the phone numbers of the agencies we donate to via automatic charges went after I wrote them down last time we got a new credit card.
I wonder where I will put them after writing the numbers down again because our card got hacked.
I wonder why people keep reading this.
I wonder  why I keep writing this.
I wonder if we will get snow tonight.
I wonder why I wonder.

super party

I have only gone to one super bowl party

     That was when the Bears destroyed the Patriots ..... many, many years ago.
     We went to Karen and Jim's and watched the game over there.
     In addition, I don't believe we have ever had people over to watch the game, besides family.
     I think we have been invited, but me being the anti social person I am, we haven't gone.
     I guess it would be fun, but I want to watch the game and not do a lot of talking.  And unless there is wine, I probably would not drink anything either.
     If I was with people today, there probably would have been a lively discussion about the half time show.  I heard performers I barely know sing music I really don't like.  Then I read on various blogs that there was a message to all of it.
     Really?
     I just thought it was a bunch of people singing and dancing.   Ok, at my age I use the term singling rather loosely.
     I did like Lady Gaga.  I missed the first few seconds, then saw this beautiful woman with  an amazing voice and at first was a little confused, because I thought Lady Gaga was doing the anthem.
    Then Jackie said it was Lady Gaga,  I just didn't recognize her.   I enjoyed that.
     I loved the first Prius commercial, with the bank robbers.  I liked the Doritos one with the baby in the hospital, and in between trips to the bathroom, letting out the dog, getting more chili, I am sure I missed some good ones.
     I did find it hard to believe companies spent $5 million on a 30 second ad.  If I was spending that much it would be a totally unforgettable, amazing commercial.
      One other part of the whole show I liked was the montage of previous half time performers.  It was sad to see the ones who died way to early, and amazing to think Mick Jagger and the Stones actually played a half time.
     And the score?  I was pulling for Denver because I am sentimental.  I like Payton Manning.  I hope he decides to retire after this win.
     It's always good to go out on top.
     Cam Newton will have other opportunities.  Of course, I thought that about the 85 Bears but that   didn't work out.  I think Rivera is smarter than Ditka, so they will be back.
     Now it's waiting for pitchers and catchers to report and for the Blackhawks to win another cup.
     I still dream of a Chicago sweep.....baseball, hockey, football, basketball, soccer.....but I don't think that will happen soon.
     But it will be a nice thought to dream on.

feeling stuffed

We had a great dinner out tonight

     I had never been to the Greenfire Grill in Rockford.  John took all of us there tonight for dinner.
     I was a little disappointed in the fish entrees, but the bison burger I had was great.  Disappointed because I love whitefish...fresh, not frozen.  I might have gone with the salmon, but I have had salmon twice in the past week.
     The highlight came at dessert.
     They do a chef's sampler, for $4 you get a half serving of dessert.
     I had creme brulee and the Cafe Patau chocolate ecstasy......both of them were amazing, but the chocolate ecstasy was a great dessert.  Dark chocolate filling,  chocolate cake, little dabs  of ice cream.....it was freakin' amazing.....and I am not lavish with praise on desserts.
     The wood fired pizzas looked and smelled great.  Jackie, Emily and Camryn had pizza while John and I munched on burgers.
     This is a place I would definitely go back to....even if it was just for a piece of ecstasy!
     So I am full......and fat....and I don't care!
     Sleep tight...don't let he hunger bug bite.
     Go Broncos!!

crap!!!

My CC  was hacked today

    I received an e mail from Capital One about suspicious activity on my account.
    We had gone to the eye doctor this morning and charged new glasses.
    Sometime after that, someone tried to do an on line purchase of $39 for a dating service.
    That set off a red flag at Capital One and they suspended my account until I could contact them and verify the charge.
    There was also another for GITHub.....but that was for 0 dollars and 0 cents.
    This is a new chip card, which is supposed to increase security.  But the fraud person explained that any merchant where I swipe the card is a target for hacking.  Chip card readers will prevent that, but not all businesses have chip card readers.
    I am not out any money, but I will be out a lot of time.  We support several organizations on a monthly or quarterly basis with automatic charges to our card.  Since I am getting a new card, I have to call the agencies and update my information.
    I just did that two months ago.  It's a pain in the butt. but it has to be done.
    So I have been thinking of punishments for these criminals.
    Here are some possibilities.
    Lock them in a room with only a land line.  Have telemarketers call every 10 minutes.
    Make them listen to every single minute of every Republican debate between the presidential candidates.
    Put them in a cell and serve them ice cream every 4 hours.  Give them 5 minutes to eat.  Only provide sporks.
    Lock them in a room with Sarah Palin for three days, or until they can see Russia, whichever comes first.  You betcha!
     Have them clean bathrooms at a middle school, using only their tongues.
     Put their names and addresses on a special cheaters website so citizens can take their own revenge.... not that I am advocating violence.
     Have them read all my blogs.
     As you can see, I am pretty vindictive.
     It just irritates the snot out of me that there are low lifes who prey on people like me, just a schmuck wanting to go through life without problems or major speed bumps.
     Hmm.... speed bumps.  That might be another good use for them.
     Watch your cards.  Check your statements.  Pay attention to the e mails and only call the number on the back of your card.
     Be smart.  Be safe.

never saw it coming

This dog is changing our lives

     I guess I never realized how much life would change with a dog.
     The endless hair on the floors and on my shirt.  I have more dog hair on my clothes than human hair on my head!
     I dust the floors, but the hair magically reappears within seconds.  So I bought a new hand held vacuum to try to suck up the hair.  Hopefully it will help.
     And those rollers with the sticky tape?  We have several.  Problem is, I can never find one when I need it.  And when I do find one, I can never peel off the dirty piece of sticky stuff to expose the new sticky stuff.  I peel off sections at a time and it takes forever to do it, so I just  go out hairy.
     I have to watch where I walk outside.  Corki may be a little dog, but she drops a big pile.  She squats, poops, walks two feet, and squats again.  So while you may miss the main event, the secondary is laying in wait.
     Whenever Jackie sits down with food, the dog is right under her.  No, we do not feed her table scraps....but someone seems to drop stuff.  Suffice it to say, we have to pick up blueberries and apples, but carrots, potato chips, pretzels and cinnamon apple straws get sucked up pretty quickly.
     We talk to the dog.  I know she does not understand us.   Or does she?
     If we say the word out, she jumps up and down.
     If we say the word food, her tail starts going like a metronome.
     She races to the word treat, no matter what part of the house it is coming from.
     When we get ready to go out we tell her to behave and what time we'll be home.  I just imagine her sitting on the floor, watching the clock.
     She never greets us at the door.  In fact, she seldom gets up when someone comes in the house.  I don't think she's a watch dog.  But if the dogs are out across the street, she is a non stop barking machine.
     And she snores.  Loudly.
     We have a routine in the morning.  The bed gets made and Corki is invited up for a session of belly rubbing, eye cleaning, back scratching, and butt rubbing from Jackie and me.  She has to be on the bed for Jackie to reach her.
     If we don't do that, Corki won't eat.
     If we are getting ready to go out, she won't eat.
     We took her for grooming yesterday, today she would not eat.
     She is a finicky little dog.
     I'm really glad we adopted her.  She has been her a little over four months and she almost has us trained to her standards.
     In another two months, she should be running the household completely.
     It's amazing how smart dogs can be.
     Too bad they can't run for president.

get a job

I had never heard of the Naked Cowboy

     It's a New York City thing.
     A regular guy stands in Times Square, wearing his tidy whidies, and carrying a guitar.
     He sings and poses for pictures with tourists.
     He has been doing this for several years in all sorts of weather...rain, snow, sleet, hail....he is out there almost naked and playing his guitar.
     Last year he made about $150,000.  If you believe the news reports, he made about $150,000.  For being in his underwear.  In Times Square.  Playing a guitar.
     I have never been to New York.  So Renee, Julie, Jimmy....if you read this, have you seen the guy?
     There were pictures of him during the recent blizzard.  He was out there, snow up to his knees practically, playing his guitar.  In his underwear.  I'm shivering just thinking about him.
     Which brings to mind a question.  It is bakeware, but underwear.  Why?  Outerwear, cookware.  I don't understand our language.
     There's also a woman who wears nothing but body paint and will pose for a picture with you.  I won't make any comment.  I don't think she can be out in the rain.
     So I'm thinking, wouldn't that be a draw in downtown Rochelle once the branding gets underway?
     No Beth, I am not volunteering.  Even without my goiter, I am not underwear model material.
     But I am sure there is someone in Rochelle who is.
     We could have a Mr. Underwear Rochelle contest to choose the best person to represent the craziness of our world and grant him territorial rights to stand outside and pose for pictures with tourists.
     And they will come.
     Field of Dreams taught us that.
     Years ago there was a TV show on called, "The Naked City."  I watched it and liked it.  It always started with something like, "There are three and a half million people in the Naked City.  This is their story."  Or something along those lines.
     So, that's my brilliant idea of the day!
     Feel free to share it with the powers that be.

it's finally here

We just got our new phonebook

     This is the one from Frontier.
     It says on the front: "new, larger print."
     Bullshit.  The print is smaller than last year.  I need a magnifying glass to see the page numbers.
     And who is listed in the phone book anyway?
     Not us!  We still have a land line, but no listing in the phone book.  We never asked for an unprinted   number.
I feel slighted.
     It's like Frontier decided to list all the people in Rochelle, DeKalb, Ashton, et al, who still had land lines but not me!  Another example of my social ostracism.
     And I wonder about the yellow pages.  The last page has the entry "zoo" on the top.
     It is blank.
     Really?  There are no zoos in the area?  I am shocked!
     I know everything is done on a format, and Chicago and Brookfield and Elgin all have zoos, as do many other towns in Illinois.
     But really.  It seems someone should have the sense to have this conversation.
     Henry, should we include the page on zoos because these are pretty small towns.
     Well, George, it's possible there is a zoo.  Let's leave it.  After all, we don't want to break the format.
     OK Henry.  Do we need pages for Air Force bases and Subway system maps too?
     Surprisingly we don't.
     And why do they make listing so complicated.
     Sometimes I find pizza under restaurants.  Sometimes I find pizza under pizza.  Sometimes I find pizza under the couch, cause that is where I dropped it and the dog can't quite reach it.
     So now I just randomly dial a number that I think is pizza and place an order.
     Maybe if the print was bigger, I could see the numbers and dial the right number to begin with.
     Larger print my butt.

Waldo...George...where are they?

I track money

     I registered years ago on the Where's George site.
     Maybe you have seen money with a red stamp on it that asks, "Where's George?"
     If you get one of those bills, you can go to the site and enter the serial number.  In an instant you will get a list of all the places that bill has gone.
     People get the bills and stamp them.  Of course, you have to buy the stamp and you run the risk of violating Federal law by defacing a bill, but I don't imagine many people get charged with that.
     Of course the President may decide to repossess all those stamps in a massive crackdown.  They can have my stamp when they pry it from my cold, dead hands.   Oh wait, that's another paranoid worry.
     Anyway, I got a bill at Rotary and entered it.
     My current bill left Indianapolis,  IN, 1 year, 320 days and 14 hours ago.  It has travelled 215 miles, at an average speed of .31 miles per day.  Yes, I can walk faster than that.
     There were no entries besides Indianapolis and Rochelle.  I guess you could say someone got the bill in Indianapolis and visited Rotary in Rochelle, but that in all likelihood did not happen.  The bill was spent, re spent, passed along until it got to Rochelle.
     In a way, I think it's kind of neat to see where money travels.
     Two of my other bills were entered Indianapolis, but there has also been bills from Cleveland, Middlebury Florida and I don't remember where.
     One of my bills started in Indianapolis, went to Sycamore, then Rochelle, then Steward, then DeKalb and last Barrington.  It hasn't been entered since.
     I don't often find them, only 7 in four years, but it's always interesting to me when I enter the serial number.
     So keep an eye out for a dollar bill with a red circle on it.
     It could have been one I had.
    You'll recognize it by the picture of George on it.