Oh brother, can you spare a dime

I must be flippin' rich

     I have to be.  Nothing else explains my terrible spending habits.
     Coupons.  I went to the grocery store and spent a lot of money.  Jackie gave me coupons every time we picked out a product.  50 cents off.  Buy one, get one.  A whole bunch of coupons.
     I held them in my hand as I approached the check out counter.
    Then I put them in my pocket ..... and found them when I got home.
     I take an eye vitamin.  Every time I buy them, I get a $5 off coupon in the box.  And every time I open the box I realize I did not use my $5 off coupon when I bought them.
     I now have a six month supply....all purchased without once using a damn coupon.
     I found the hummingbird food I bought last spring because I was going to put up my hummingbird feeder.  Well, that seems to be a waste of time now!  Why did I buy it if I wasn't going to use it?  Not a rhetorical question.  I actually planned on using it.  I just didn't.
     I just hope the suet cakes I bought when we lived on Skare Court are still good, because i am putting them out this year!
     Hollyhock seeds?  They'll be good next year.
     5 composition notebooks?  Who can pass up composition notebooks for 50 cents each?
     The Dremel tool kit I had to have?  Emily is the only person that uses it.  Thank heavens I borrowed it back before the tornado.  But I never used it!
     In other ways I am cheap.  I do the Sunday Tribune crosswords using a mechanical pencil I had when I was teaching.  I retired 8 years ago!  I still use the pencil because I still have lead for it and I don't want to wast the 79 cent package of lead!  OK, the pencil is falling apart and is hard to grip because the gripper is deteriorating.....but I have the lead!
     It gets worse. Every year it gets worse.
     About the only thing I buy that I am sure to use is wine....and I have about 20 bottles of that in the basement.  Oh, chocolate.  I always find a use for chocolate.
     Like right now.  I just finished a Swiss rose....and I think I'll go open a candy bar.  I do try to limit myself to one full bar a week.....but that usually means eating it on Monday and Tuesday and waiting until the next Monday for more.
     At least they don't go to waste.  Well, come to think of it.......they do go to waist!
     Of course, you already knew that!