truly tired

Sleeping with four females can tire a guy out

   Yes, I was expected to provide a few things.  Dinner.  Drink.  Entertainment.  Company.
   But these four females wore me out.
   Dogsitting can be very tiring.  I am tired now.
   I have seen two plays, done laundry, watched dogs, gone to the store, attended church, gotten up before 7 a.m., gone out to dinner with friends, played cards.
   And now I am sitting at the computer instead of going to bed.
   What is wrong with me?

time to hit he road?

I had a serious talk about moving today

     With the howling wind, driving rain, freezing temperatures, crumbling roads, failing infrastructure, the dysfunctional government..... I thought it might be time to consider options.
     I ruled out Florida.  Too hot.  Too crowded with old people.  Alligators.
     Nix on Texas.  Too many Texans.  And rattle snakes.  And the view south may not be too good.
     No Arizona.  Too hot.
     No Nevada.  Too many gambling casinos and legal brothels.
     Hawaii?  Too expensive.  And too far.  Plus when the oceans rise, flooding could be a problem on an island.
     No California.  Too many earthquakes, droughts, floods, expensive housing, plus it is closest to the nukes, should they arrive in my lifetime.
     Tennessee?  I can't understand people from the south.
     I also thought about foreign countries.
     Belize..... does not appeal to me.
     Costa Rica.... just not sure about South America in general.
     France.....ahhhh......If I could.  But I know someone would not go with.  Same with Italy.  And Switzerland?  Julia would flip, plus we could not afford living there.
     I know I would be giving up Cubs baseball,  but after all, I have seen a World Series come to the north side.
    I would miss the people and friends, but they would always be welcome to visit for a day, or two.
    I did find one place that sounds ideal.
    There is a legal limit to the snow.
    And winter never starts until December, and exits March 2 on the dot.
    Summers linger to September.
    It only rains at night, after dark....and the morning fog must disappear by 8.
    It's a wonderful place.
    Maybe you'd like to join us there......if you know where it is, that is.
     I'll let you know when we relocate.

busy days......

I can't believe retirement

     I am busier now than I ever was.  When you have free time, it fills.  Someone said nature abhors a vacuum.
    Well, sometimes vacuums suck!
    Between doctor appointments, hair appointments, car appointments and appointment appointments, I don't have many free days.
    Yet, I keep saying yes to things.
     So.....I am cutting back on my commitments!  Yes, that's right.  Roll your eyes.
     But I am.
     Just to show you how serious I am, just call me and ask us out to dinner.  I guarantee we will say no.  Really.  Just call us.  Please.
     By the way, sometimes I don't tell the truth.
     And Exit 99 is making a comeback.  We're meeting next week. And probably several times after that.   But that is a fun time, so maybe it doesn't count.
     Curses commitments!

it's Tuesday today!

I sometimes get distracted

    I mentioned my history walk in Monday's little effort and said I would talk about it Tuesday.  I forgot and have not been able to sleep since.
    Well, I'm talking about it, so today is Tuesday.
    I am going to lead a history walk around downtown Rochelle for the Flagg Township Museum.
    I am calling it Rochelle Then and Now.  It will have some information, some non information, and be entertaining.  I hope.
    Wifey thinks I am crazy.  She doesn't think any one will come.  News for her, Emily or John is going to bring her to the first one, so there will be at least two people.  I don't count.  (Well, maybe someone will bring her.....)
    We cover about a mile, starting at the museum and winding our way through the downtown area.
    The walks start at 5:30 on the second Friday of the month, to go along with the Second Friday promotion downtown businesses have.  I hope to be done in about 45 minutes, but I do talk a little too much sometimes.
    At the end of the walk a donation bucket will be passed around.  People hopefully will put in money and not take it out.  All the proceeds go to the museum.
    Honestly, I don't know what to expect.  I hope it will be entertaining and informative, for me and for the people that attend.
    Lots of small towns in Europe have walking tours.  Sometimes they are ghost tours, or watchman tours, and they always draw a crowd.  Of course those are in Europe and generally in  areas more touristy than Rochelle.
    I will be doing them starting in May and ending in October, although the October one will probably be on a Saturday.
    Hopefully people will try it, like it, tell friends and it will become a thing to do.
    Hopefully.
    Whew!  Now I can sleep better. Heck, I may not even wake up until Friday!

memory lane...again

My friend Dan and I spoke to a seniors' group today

    These were folks in Creston, our program was on the Cuba trip we took last year.
    In fact, it has been just a little over a year that Dan and I went to that island in the sun.
    Talking to people today was a great way to relive the experience and refresh my memory about the trip.
    The downside was, in a room full of seniors, none of us were young enough or skilled enough to get my slide show up and running on the tv.
    We plugged in the thumb drive, and the menu popped up to browse photos, play slide show, etc.  But the only two we could click on were browse photos and exit.
    And when we hit the browse photos option, nothing happened.
    We tried it several times with the same result.
    There was no 8 year old around to solve our problem. so we used Dan's wife Linda's laptop and paraded around the room with the pictures displayed on that.
    Not ideal, but it was a small crowd.
    If we had a proper cord, we could have tried hooking the computer to the tv...but who travels with extra cords?  Next time I will!
    In the end, people said they enjoyed the talk and the pictures.  I enjoyed talking and eating, two of my favorite activities.
    We have another "gig" in July.  I will be sure I know how to run the equipment for that one!

damn it

Oops....... I did it again

   No, I am not just throwing out lyrics to old music.
   Let me explain.  I don't always ask questions, or for advice.
   I have some patio furniture.  Wooden.  Eucalyptus wood, if I remember.
   I usually sand it down and coat it with a polyurethane at the start of the summer season.
   Last year I did that, and when the first coat was dry I put a second coat on parts of the chair...armrests, for example.... without sanding the first coat.  I guess you do that to make sure the second coat adheres.
   Well I didn't.
   So the chairs look mottled on the arms.  And the table looks mottled.
   I figured do it right this year.
   I sanded them down.
   Then I went and bought the polyurethane.
   Now, a really smart buyer would say to the paint store guy, "Hey Al, I would like some of the polyurethane you sold me last year."
   But not me.
   I went in, said I want a quart of Steffens for an outside project.
   Bought it.  Took it home.  Opened it.  Smelled it.
   It did not smell like the stuff I used last year.  The can did not look the same as I remember.
   But I applied the product.  Then I rummaged through my shelf of crap and found the almost empty can from last year.....and it is not the same.  Not even close.  It's called Zar
   I read the label.  It's designed for doors and wooden windows.  It's oil based.  And it takes 48 hours to dry, so avoid moisture.
   I guess the piece that is out on the patio is not going to meet the 48 hour window.
   Plus, it was twice the cost of what I had been using.
   Jackie, always being the most logical, said, "Why didn't you just ask him what you bought last year?"
   Because I knew, damn it!  I knew what I wanted.  I wanted Steffens.  The question is why?  I had never used it before, never bought it before, had no knowledge or experience with it....so why?
   Tomorrow I will call him and ask him for suggestions.  Maybe he will say it will be fine.  Maybe he will say......sand everything down and come buy some Zar.
And maybe it won't rain in the next 48 hours because I can't get my car in the garage with all the sticky patio furniture in it.
Damn.

Something lighter.

My mom's favorite

Look what Jackie got for Easter!!

Such a sad face......

still amazed

I always get puzzled when I ride my bike 

    Going around my subdivision is about 2.2 miles.  If I ride in the country, it puzzles me.  Today I rode south on Skare, then through a little subdivision and along some roads.
    I was almost at my friend Jim's house when I hit the 3 mile mark!  I rode almost all the way to IL 38 and it was not much more than going around my block once.
    Verrry interesting.
    Back and forth on the bike path is about the same as three times around my block.
    The problem is, I get bored going the same route.  I need to start riding to Kings again.  And when the bike path is completed into town, that will give me an opportunity for a nice ride.
    I had a chance this morning to "tour" the building called the Graber/Kepner/Binz building in downtown Rochelle.
    Truthfully, it is a mess.
    It is over 100 years old and has been sadly neglected lately.
    But it is very cool inside!
    On the second floor were apartments.  Little one room units.  On the third floor there were more spacious apartments.  The ones in front had pretty cool views of the corner of Fourth and Lincoln.  And they had their own bathrooms, something the second floor did not have, instead sharing a communal bath at the end of the hall.
    I have been to Europe several times and am always impressed by the old buildings, still functional, still used.
    I wonder why in this country we tear down the older ones and build new buildings.  It happens in Rochelle, Chicago, everywhere; with hundred year old mansions and buildings gone, replaced by some bland slab of concrete.  Can't some of these ancient ones be saved?
    I wanted to tour the building so I could give a little insight about it during my history walks.
    Don't know about my history walks?   Tune in tomorrow.

sigh......

I just had a busy but nice weekend

     We got to visit Jackie's brother and sister in law from California and the whole crew of Jackie's at a niece's house.  Malnati's deep dish pizza, good conversation and catching up with relatives we don't see often enough....great times.
     Time goes buy so quickly.
     Also spent time working on the church garden along with some NIU students from two sororities.  I was on my best behavior.  I was a little surprised when some of then said they had never seen a strawberry plant.  Then again, why would they?
     Today we had Bob and Anita out for lunch and a final visit before they head out on the road again.
     Of course, the Cubs lost, which ruined an almost perfect day.  I did not burn the meat, although one piece was a little dark.  And I talked to Julia and my twin nieces, who celebrated turning 16 today.
     Now it's time to sit, relax, read a little....and then go to bed.  I think I will have happy dreams.

we are them

I used to always laugh at my older aunts and uncles

   They dressed funny.  They had weird habits, like saving everything.  They always complained about their aches and pains.  They didn't like driving at night. Loud noises and rude people bothered them.  They squeezed nickles so tight, the bison bled.
    And they always talked about olden times.
    I realized tonight, we is them.
    I have not gotten to the point where I hide money in clothes hanging in the closet, or having to go home before the sun sets because I don't like driving at night.  Well, actually, I don't like driving at night.  And I do have some jars of coins in the closet.....Holy Crap!!!!
     But at least I don't complain about the music of today, unless it is that rap crap or the high pitched whiny sounding singers and the bam bam bam bam that sounds like it is coming from a computer. Oh, wait.
     My parents used to complain about guys with long hair.  Well, I am much more tolerant.  I don't mind the long hair.  But those huge holes in the ear lobes cause me to freak out a little.  What the hell is that all about??  Doesn't the wind whistle when it passes through?
    And fashion?  Why do people pay huge dollars for jeans with rips in them when you can go to a second hand store or thrift shop and buy ripped pants for a fraction of the price.  Or come to my closet and take the ripped ones I use for working in the garden.
    I do dress funny.  I do save things.  I do talk about my aches and pains.
    Good grief, I am Uncle Jim!
    Come to think of it, that may not be a bad thing.  He was a pretty neat guy with great stories and two amazingly quaint cottages on a lake in Michigan, cottages my family spent many a summers at, just doing nothing.
    I do miss the old folks.
    And someday, somebody will call up a memory and tell a story about Uncle Terry.  People will laugh, and it will be good.
    Happy Earth Day.  

the rest of the story

I did not have a great post prom experience

   Yesterday I mentioned my night of much anticipated senior excitement called prom was pretty much a dud.
    Our school had a tradition of going on a picnic the day after prom.
    The eight of us talked about it.  We set a time.  We set a destination.  We set a plan.
    At some ungodly hour seven of us drove in the clown car to Diane's house. She was my date.
    After a night of non dancing and limited conversation, I was hoping a day in the sun at a Wisconsin lake would be a redeeming end to the ordeal.
    We got to her house early.  It was after the sun rose, I remember that.
    We pulled up out in front.  No Diane.  We waited.  Five minutes. 10.  Maybe 20.
     I didn't want to ring the bell, our driver did not want to blow the horn.
     It was a warm morning, so I got out of the car and started calling, "Diane. Diane. Diane."
    Finally a head appeared and she said, in a much annoyed voice, "What do you want!"
    I reminded her we were picnicking.  She grunted and disappeared.
    She eventually came out, more sullen than ever, and the eight of us motored down the road.
    You have to understand, I am an idiot.
    Our driver, Bob, was kind of a tough guy.  He wore a white t shirt and had a pack of Camels tucked in under the sleeve.
     None of the other guys smoked.  He was the only one.
    So he drove and smoked.  I was in the back of the station wagon with John by the tail gate. No seats.  Every time we made a turn, John and I bounced from one side of the wagon to the other.  At least I think it was John.  It was 60 years ago, so my memory might be a little off.
We were rocking and rolling along and Bob said, very casually, "Any of you guys want a cigarette?"  I could not see his face, but I knew he was smirking.
    I said, "Yeah, I'll take one."  He was a little surprised, as was everyone else, but he passed back a Camel.
    I took it.  He said, "You need a light?"
   And I said the dumbest words ever recorded in the history of adolescence.
   "I don't need a light, I'm a man.  I eat them."
    And I bit off about half of the Camel and started chewing, paper and all.
    I think John was the first one to yell, "Pull over, now!"
    Luckily Bob did. Of course the sudden turn bounced us back and forth like like pin balls in a tilted machine.
    By then I had turned a shade of green that was.... far out of normal for a pasty faced white boy who never sat in the sun.  I did not feel well.
    Diane looked at me, shook her head and turned around.  I don't think she spoke to me the rest of the day or the remainder of the school year, another reason she didn't get prom pictures.
    Turned out that was the highlight of the day.
    We got to the lake, piled everyone out of the clown car, and went about picnicking.  The girls and two other guys took a nap.  John and I walked around the lake.  We were probably gone at least 2 hours.  No one noticed. When lunch came out, I just didn't feel like eating.  Cigarettes do that to you.
    Back in 1967 $100 was a lot of money to spend on one date, but it seems to me I spent a lot more than that on prom.
    I never got a dance.  I never got a kiss.
   But I think I may still have those pictures someplace.

did you hear the one about...

I always stroll down Memory Lane on prom weekend

   Kids at the local high school  have  prom this Saturday.  I love looking at all the people dressed to the nines in pictures their proud parents post on Facebook.  (Notice the clever use of alliteration?)
   I, too, went to prom.
   And I may have told this story.  If so, it will be different.  Stories are always different the second or third time.  I learned that from my friend the fireman.
   I may have been socially awkward in high school.  (Ok, I still am.)
   I asked a girl to prom, but she had already accepted another date.  She told me she wished I had asked her earlier.
   So I asked a girl, we'll call Diane.  (Actually, that was her name.)
   She was a senior and also a little socially awkward.
   I didn't drive.  Didn't have a license.  Didn't have a car.
   But a double date was out of the question, because the more the merrier.   So we quadruple dated!  One of the guys rented a station wagon and the eight of us crammed into it and went to the Edgewater Beach Hotel......or maybe not, John will correct me.  Now that I think about it, it might have been a downtown Chicago hotel.
   When we got there it was like a clown car at the circus!  People kept getting out and getting out and getting out.  I think our classmates came out of the dance to stare at us.
   I am not a good dancer, but I try.  Diane was not a dancer.  She didn't talk much either.
   She was close to my height, but she had her hair "done up" and the top of her hair towered above me.  I swear to god, there were eagles nesting in it!
   We got our pictures taken together.  There I am, a skinny (yes, Beth...skinny) geeky looking guy with spots all over his face and this Amazonian woman with a satiny blue dress towering above me.
   I always meant to give her some of the pictures after they were sent to me.
   But to be honest, I had such a horrible experience, I kept them for spite.
   It may have been our fifth reunion, I don't remember.  Jackie went.  And I took the pictures to give to Diane, thinking it would be funny.
   She was there with her husband, who proceeded to drink a lot.  I kind of remember him as bragging about how smart or rich he was, but maybe that isn't accurate.  Anyway, she nagged him, he drank, she nagged, he drank and I held onto the pictures.
   The last I saw of her....I believe she was headed into the woman's rest room.  That was where her husband had wandered into, much to Jackie's amusement.
   But if prom was bad, the day after was even worse.
   That's another story, probably one you have heard before.

mini rant time

I am just pissed at a lot of little things

   For no reason other than I get tired of seeing or hearing the same stuff.
     Tail gaiters.  When you drive, please keep off the tail of the car in front of you.  It's annoying.  It's dangerous.
     Drunken drivers.  Time to start calling these people what they are:  murderers, or potential murderers.  Alcohol is no excuse for killing someone.  We need to treat this crime  tougher than we do.
     Guns.  We have too many of them.  The answer to curbing gun violence is not putting more guns out there, it is getting rid of guns.  Every time I read about a disturbed person who killed his family, or neighbors, or former co-workers or just some stranger walking down the street I get irritated at a society and lawmakers who allow mentally unbalanced people to have guns.  Insanity.
Make background checks mandatory, make wait days longer, prohibit all sales without background checks and make registration mandatory.  And create stiff penalties for people possessing guns illegally.
     ATV drivers who don't respect the rights of others and feel they can just ride their vehicles anywhere.
     People who fight at baseball games.
     The Blackhawks.
     Drunks at baseball games who ruin it for every one around them.
     Using an obscenity to describe our president.  I don't like him, but using obscenities to describe him is not winning anybody over.  Truthfully, I think it does more harm than good.
     Protesters who engage in fisticuffs with the opposing side.
     Idiots who dump their garbage along the road.
     Plastic bags.
     State lawmakers who allow themselves to be controlled by Mike Madigan:  they are gutless politicians who should be voted out of office.
     Our entire state government.
     Loud motorcycles after 10 p.m. and before 7 a.m.
     Watching people like the football player who just killed himself in prison.  He had it all...looks, money, fame... and it wasn't enough.  Even in college he was a bad egg and he still got drafted and had a bucketful of money tossed at him.
     Gangs.  Why can't they work to improve their neighborhood or community?  Clean up vacant lots, run errands for seniors, paint a community center, get an education and help others.  No.  Instead they shoot.  Senseless.
     Men who abuse women.
     Racism.
     Fear.
     People who don't keep their property neat.
     People who complain.  Oh wait..........

whew!!!

I had a busy day

     There was Rotary, and Jackie's MRI, and grocery shopping, and a visitation..... but I did manage to wedge a bike ride into the day.
     I was amazed by the colors showing.  If you have not ventured out into an area with trees or flowers this week, do so tomorrow.  If it doesn't rain.
     Anyway, here are some of my views today.

Trees by the high school are gorgeous

Put me in coach, I'm ready to play

Another reason I hate plastic bags

Street to high school is lined with bloomers

just saying ....

It was a pretty nice Easter for me

    Nice church experience, great food, visiting with family, but I wish I could have said hello to Julia and Mike and his family.  We were so  busy, it was too late when we got home.
    Today was pretty nice also, but I did have a United Way meeting from 1-5:30.     It is really tough when so many deserving agencies ask for more money than is available.
    That is a sobering experience and has put me in a reflective mood.
    That saying.... I did have an ego building experience today.
    Jackie and I were at a function when a total stranger looked at me and said,
"Aren't you the guy in the paper?"  And his wife said, "You are Terry Dickow."
    Now if you read the Rochelle paper you know I do a column  twice a month and the picture is small....sometimes I  can't even tell it's me.  And this 83 year old with cataracts in both eyes recognized me.
    I was surprised.
    And I drove home with the window open in the car because my head was having a hard time fitting in.

scuze me while I burp

We went to brunch today

   The Hindenburg.  Jupiter.  Exxon.  Shell.  Me.
   What do those all have in common?
   Gas giants.
   Now I am not saying I ate too much at brunch today, but I am having trouble moving right now.   It could have been the second helping of meat, or the second helping of dessert, or the multiple strips of bacon.....but I think I ate too much.
   When we were in college, we used to go to my brother's house in Rockford on Sunday.  I would eat like crazy.  I told him I was eating for three.  He asked if Jackie was pregnant.   I told him no, I was eating for three days.
   I did that today.
   If I was a bear, I could now hibernate for the entire winter.
   I  ran into a furry creature today and had to get a picture.
   Here we are.

   I look sad and the bunny is perplexed because no one else in our group wanted to have a picture with the Easter Bunny!
   It was a good time...even ran into some people friends there!
   Good food and family....can't beat that with a 10 foot drumstick.

 

twangy guitars, please

I'm back in the saddle again

   At least back on the riding lawn mower.
   It seems like it has been months since I mowed the lawn.
   As usual, I waited too long.  The grass in the back was very tall and a little clumpy in spots.
   I can't figure it out.  Same grass seed, same environment, same tender loving indifference yet the back yard is lush, thick, green while the front yard is sparse and patchy.
   It's been over seeded, fertilized, aerated, and thanks to Corki, amply fertilized in certain areas.  Is there a product I can spray to maybe counter the affects of dog urine?  Or is it effects.  No, I am sticking with affects.
   Other puzzlements:  Why do some of my plants do well and others of the same type just die?
   Why aren't the Cubs hitting better?  Out homered by a visiting team?  Scandalous.
   When should I plant vegetables??
   Anyway...too much to ponder tonight.
   I hope everyone has a Happy Easter!

driver's ed lesson 1

I swear, I am sometimes clueless

     I had a zoo day today.  First off, Jackie did not fall and did not have any problems.  That is good.
     I drive my Honda to the zoo.  In fact, I drive my Honda almost everywhere I go.
     I had my cruise set for 68 on the tollway.  Yes, I know the speed limit is 70 but I get noticeably worse gas mileage at that speed.  My  best MPG speed is between 55 and 60, but you can't drive that on the tollway and survive.
     I had to slow down for a slower vehicle, so I hit my brakes.  When the left lane cleared, I passed the truck, and hit my cruise control set button.  The car immediately slowed down.  So I sped up, hit my cruise control again and again the car did not maintain speed.
     I was getting a little frustrated.
     So I did it one more time and realized I was not hitting the cruise control, but the volume button for the radio.
     Me bad.
     After a fun day at the zoo, I got in the car, called home, turned on the Cub game and attempted to drive off.
     The car would not move.  Would not go in reverse or forward.  I thought maybe I had ruined the transmission in some way.
     Turns out I never started the car, so of course it would not move.
     Me bad, again.
     We went to DeKalb tonight and I was on Hueber Parkway at Glidden Road.  I turned to Jackie and asked, "When did they put a stop sign here?"
    She looked at me like I was nuts and said it had always been there, ever since the road was built.
     Turns out I thought I was on a different road.  I finally had to ask her where the hell I was.
     My confusion cleared up quickly.
     It's just strange that a car I drive constantly, and a road well traveled in my life, would temporarily discombobulate me completely!

so little time

If WW III starts while I'm asleep, I'll be pissed

     I keep thinking of all the things I wanted to do, like visit California before nukes.  Just don't think it will have the same look afterward.
     I know, TD you are supposed to be funny,  not so darned serious.  And scary.
     I haven't gotten the basement cleaned out yet.  That is important to do before the end comes.  Yes, it matters.  The next generation of cyborgs will wonder what the hell was wrong with me.  Postcards, train tracks, old stuff, three pillars that don't fit in the house, 186 rolls of toilet paper, 72 rolls of paper towels.  And a partridge in a pear tree.  All gathering dust in the lower part of the house.
     You can't deal with an unstable leader, one who seems to be all over the place with the truth and ego fulfillment.  And then you have the guy in North Korea.
     I will have nightmares for the next 12 years, or the rest of my life, whichever comes first.
     And I have a sense that the Mother of All Bombs dropped today on the crazy people in Afghanistan will inspire a new round of "mother of all...." claims.
     A big baby?  The Mother of all Babies.
     A new car?  The Mother of all Cars.
     Huge rainfall?   The Mother of all Rainfalls.
     An Addison Russell homer?  The Mother of all Homers.
     Mother Teresa?  The Mother of all Mothers.
     Which reminds me.  In high school I was not one of the "in" kids.  I was generally in the category you might call shy loner.  Some of us formed a club in our junior year.
     In my high school there were all sorts of clubs with Greek Names.  Mu Alpha Theta was the Math Club, Deltas were the cheerleaders...birds of a feather tended to flock together.
     But a bunch of us didn't really have a group.  Shy people, a minority, the smartest girl in the school, the biggest guy in the school, funny people, smart people, out side the box people.
     So we formed our own club, even got a staff member to sponsor it.  I believe it was the only club he ever sponsored.  There was a rumor going around that he was also a member of the Communist Party, so that may have been why he took to us.
     We named our club Mu Theta Alpha.....and we called ourselves "The Mathaaas".
     When we had our class picture, we all wore black except for our one minority member, he wore white.  And I think they made our mascot take off her Playboy bunny ears and tail, but that was what she wanted to do after high school.
      We thought it was tremendously cool to do that.
      Kids....go figure.
     Happy memories to drift off to sleep with, perchance to dream of a world that no longer exists.

progress

I went for a long walk today with Corki

   Actually,  Corki, Todd, Roscoe and Maggie.
   I was really proud of Corki.  She did not bark, lunge, growl, snarl, hiss, jump or otherwise act crazy when Roscoe and Maggie came.  She just greeted them and they all walked on.
   I am glad I am not a dog.  I don't think I would like sniffing people's butts to see if they were ok or not.
   Nor would I like walking on all fours and not seeing what was higher up off the ground.
   And I sure would not drink out of a toilet bowl, as a lot of dogs do.
   Hard, dry food?  Bleech.
   Having to depend on someone to let me out, feed me, water me.....no thanks.
   Sure the idea of sleeping about 18 hours a day is appealing, as is getting all the attention when people walk into a room.
   But when I hear people talk about a dog's life, I don't look at it as a good thing.
   I like tea, coffee, a good steak, baseball games and riding my bike.  I don't think life as a dog would offer me the same opportunities.
   But I gotta go now.  Jackie is calling me and that means maybe I'll get a treat!

hurray for me!!

I accomplished something today!

Look at this!

   That's right, my 5 billion piece puzzle is done!  My goal was to finish it by the home opener, but I was a day late.  Blame it on the rain.
   Emily and Camryn were helpers.  Emily put together most of the infield and    Camryn found the missing piece that was right in front of my eyes.  The puzzle was out of alignment because I missed a piece on the left side.  She found it quite easily.
   Now, do I want to save it ?  If so, how do I do that??
   By the way, this is the first puzzle I have finished.  How about that.  Almost 69 years old and I finally finished one.
    Maybe it's time to get back to work on my novel.
    That would be even a bigger accomplishment!

not for the weak

I have a highly personal problem I must share

   I can't keep my pants on.
   Seriously!!  They keep dropping off my rather ample waist!  No matter how tight I make the belt, the suckers drop down to my knees then my ankles.
   It's not just one pair, it is almost every pair of jeans I own!
   I could use suspenders, but I look hideous in suspenders.  I am like one of those old guys with the huge bellies you see all over town.
   Yes, I am old.  Yes, I have a huge belly.  You are missing the point.
   I seldom wear anything but jeans lately, so I am not sure about my other pants.    I think they fit better, but I don't remember.
   What I do know is I take 20 steps then I have to hitch up my pants.  If people are watching me, they must think I am OCD (ok, I may be) or have a very nervous tic that manifests itself in me pulling up my pants.
    I know if I lose weight that will solve the problem, but I have been saying that for 20 years.  We know that is not going to happen.
    But when I walk from the kitchen to the den, my pants will drop.
    I don't understand.  It is frustrating.
    And embarrassing.
    One time I was walking Corki and I felt them dropping and I could not pull them up, so I ended up holding them up with one hand and carrying the dog poop bag and leash in the other.
    I was afraid to wave to people when they passed me lest my pants fell down and I mooned them unintentionally.   Well, technically not mooned them, but exposed my boxers.
    There has to be an answer.
    I just hope I find it soon, or at least before I expose myself.

2 cups of what????

I constantly copy or cut out recipes

     I always picture myself making these wonderful dishes....like the chicken Parmesan that Renee posted.  At least I think it was Renee.  It looks easy to make and is delicious sounding.
     I also have some recipes for lemon tarts, lemon meringues, chocolate mousse and dozens of other foods.
     I never make them.  I just think about it.
    Well, I did make the lemon tart recently and I thought it was delicious.  I will make that again.
    Why don't I make them?
    Two reasons.
    I don't like gathering all the ingredients.
    I don't like washing all the dishes.
    And I think they are darn good reasons.
    Yes, I have a dish washer and I could easily put the dirty stuff in the dish washer. But not our pans, which came with the directions to NOT put them in the dishwasher.  Julia got some really neat pans and I think they go in the dishwasher.  But ours don't.  Go figure.
    And usually the dishwasher is almost full.  No matter the day, it seems to be almost full.  Even after I empty it, it is almost full.  I swear, it is a magic machine that takes clean dishes off our shelf and dirties them in the dishwasher.  I wish I had security cameras in the kitchen to prove my theory.
    But the chicken Parmesan looks pretty easy to make.  And it only needs one or two bowls.  I think I can handle that.
    Now about that chocolate mousse.......

not you, again

I have found a sure fire way to get rich

      It's perfectly legal.  The start up costs may seem high, but this is a winner.
     And it all has to do with facial recognition software.
     And toilet paper.
     And China.
     This week the Chinese government announced that they were installing new toilet paper dispensers at the nations most visited sites.
     These are facial recognition devices.  You step up to it, it scans your face, and dispenses 2 feet of toilet paper.  It will not dispense more to you for nine minutes.
     Why?
     Because too many people are stealing the toilet paper at the tourist sites.
     I am certain that the toilet paper is a single ply.
     Putting it as delicately as possible, I don't think a single ply would work very well for the majority of people.
     And if you double the paper, you only get one foot.  Make it 4 ply and you get like a six inch piece, or tissue, as we call it.
    If you have great body control, you may be able to cobble enough paper for a comfortable sit after 27 minutes or so.
    So here is my plan.
    I go to China with a crap load (I think it's a clever pun) of toilet paper and sell it at the tourism sites for $1 per foot.
    This is grade A multi ply extra strength paper, the good stuff.  A little of this goes a long way.  Figuratively, a long way.
     I have in my basement about 747 feet of toilet paper.  I could stretch my paper from home to dead center at Wrigley and almost make it back to home again.
     I think I could get it all in one suitcase.  If I take two suitcases I could make almost $1,500!  And if I get it shipped to me in even larger amounts, I could truly be the toilet paper king in China.
     Now, you may think this is a pretty crappy idea, and in fact it is!
     But I think it's a winner.
    Anybody want to get on board with me????

it's in the numbers

I figured out my own personal mystery!

     Yes, I know there was a redundancy in that statement.  Deal with it.
     The number from two days ago....36,041...not the number of licks to the center of a Tootsie Pop, not Highland City Alabama (zip code!),  and not the number of hours spent watching a pregnant giraffe not give birth.
     I honestly thought it was something I read in the paper.  But it was an e mail.
     I was walking Corki today and stopped to talk to the fan club Corki has at the end of the block.  Kids love her.  A neighbor remarked her husband was taking their grandson to the boy's first Cub game Monday night.
     I said something about knowing someone who has tickets is a big help, with a laugh because her husband has season tickets.
     That's when it hit me.  36,041 is my spot on the Cubs' season ticket waiting list!  They e mailed me Monday to update me./...I wrote the number down and pfft...gone.
     My brother called and asked me if I had seen the results for the Joliet Junior College board election.
     There were two two year positions open and one candidate earned the second spot by getting 26,003 votes, nearly 1,500 votes more than the third candidate, who obviously did not win.
     The kicker?  The winning candidate died March 7!
     But 26,003 voters felt a dead person was a better candidate than the other people on the ballot!
     Explain that to your grandchildren:  I could have been president, but I was discouraged after I lost my first election to a dead person.
     The deceased was on the ballot because ballots had already been printed and in some cases mailed for absentee voting, so they could not be changed.
     And several people in the story said they voted for her as a way to pay respects to the service she has given the community.
     I think the bigger problem will be if the deceased shows up at a board meeting... like a governmental Weekend at Bernie's.
     My guess is I will also be long gone when it's time for me to buy a season ticket...I've been on the list for at least 6 years.
     Time will tell.

it never ends

I was thinking about a trip to France today

    It must have been the third or fourth year Julia was there.  We stayed at a chateau in a small village some 90 km north of Paris.
    The family that owned it had to do some major repairs after The Great War, which started 100 years ago today for the United States.  The powers that be were already in the thick of battle by the time we joined.  Fresh fodder for the canons, I guess.
    Like I said, it was a small village.
    The house itself had been in the thick of battle, at some points behind German lines, at other points behind French lines.
    And in every town I have been in in France, there is a memorial to the dead from that war and the one that followed.
    We went to Verdun, which was a nightmare.  Eight months of fighting and when it ended, nobody had advanced or retreated.  Hundreds of thousands of men died.  I don't think there could have been a family left untouched by the horrors of that war.
    There is a building called The Ossuary there.  I don't think I spelled it correctly, but I am close.  In the basement of the building are rooms where piles of bones are stacked.  Femurs, here, tibia there, skulls over there.  They were killing so fast and so furious that when men were buried, they were often blown up again.
    Millions of people died in The Great War, and millions more died in the second war.
    I don't understand people.
    What makes us so violent?  The number of shootings that take place on a daily basis in our country is a shame.  And why do countries go to war?  Land?  Riches?  Power?
    I used to think humans were highly civilized, intelligent creatures, but that thought passed from my mind years ago.
   We might be the worst of the creatures God or whomever or whatever put on the earth.
    I had always hoped that someday there would be peace in the world, but I have come to accept that will never happen.
    By the way, did you know that the Cantigny Estate in Wheaton is named after the French town Cantigny?  Col. Robert McCormick, publisher of the Tribune, was in charge of an artillery unit and they saw the first action by US forces in France.
    There is an amazing history of the First Division, The Big Red One, in the Wheaton museum.  It makes for an interesting visit.  It is currently closed, but will reopen later this summer.
   I just hope our latest experience in Syria does not lead to bigger, and worse, conflict.

I'm sorry, what was that?

My train of thought has left the station

   And I was not with it.
   Seriously!  I am having brain farts like crazy.
   Sometimes when I am thinking of this blog I get a brilliant idea.  Funny, insightful, thought provoking.....sometimes.
   I keep a pad of paper near the computer to write down ideas.
   Here is what I wrote down this morning:
   36,041
   No other notes, comments, ideas...just 36,041.
   I have eliminated some thoughts:
   My weight.
   Our bank balance.
   The amount we owe IRS.
   Number of miles I have ridden on my indoor bike this year.
   The number of Jackie's tissues I have picked up this week.  She is following the don't bend over rule, so I can't complain.
   Mileage on either car.
   Number of pencils from various sources I have collected.  I don't often use pencils, so I don't know the reason I collect them.
   Number of blog views.....happily it is over 73,000.  Again, thank you.
   Calories in tonight's supper.
   All I know is I was reading the Trib and something triggered my mind.
   Two days ago I wrote down something from Dilbert:  If you always want more, you can never by happy with what you have.
   Pretty powerful words from a comic strip.
   Anybody have any clue what 36,041 might mean?   Because I sure don't and it will drive me nutty before long.

that was weird, not in a good way either

I had a rather difficult day

    I had this crazy dream that woke me up.  In the dream, the world was spinning and spinning and spinning to the point that I was almost sick.
    Then I woke up at 6:30 and......the world was spinning and spinning and spinning to the point that I was almost sick!
    Dreams can come true!!  Thanks, Walt, for teaching us that.
    I staggered, literally, to my chair and plopped down, keeping a certain dog off of my lap in case I had to make a run for the bathroom.
    I tried focusing on one part of the room, and that helped.
   After about an hour, I made a cup of tea, popped some ibuprofen, and headed back to the chair.
    I was still woozy, but it was so much better.
    Then the headache hit.
    That was 10 hours ago and I still have the headache, although it is not bad and I am not dizzy.  But I am extremely tired.
    It got me wondering....who takes care of the guy who takes care of the girl?
   This aging stuff is no fun at all!

got some learnin to do

I have lived in Rochelle for..... a long time

     It's a rural area.  I get it.  The radio station carries a lot of farm related news.
     So you would think after 40 plus years out here I would know more than I do!
     For example, why are pigs called pork bellies?  When they give a livestock report they say November pork bellies are up.  Up where?  In trees?  On the roof?  Awake?  And what about the rest of the pig?  Is it down?  Sold separately?  Some disassembly required?
     Beef cattle I get.  Those are cows we will eat as hamburger.  But why do they give prices for months in advance?
     I know they can store corn and soybeans, so I get it when they give prices for those in the fall.
     Well, not really.  But I think I can fake that one.
     Compounding the problem is when I go into Chicago and listen to the radio I hear traffic reports for roads  but I don't know where they are!  Borman expressway?  Elgin-0'Hara toll?  And they go through the roads so fast I never figure out if I am heading into a bottleneck or if I am already in one and don't know it.
     I guess I wasn't paying attention.  Or thought about enough to ask or Google it.
     I will just continue to live in agriignorance and hope the road I am on is clear.
     Truthfully, I could go for some bacon right about now.

thanks

Just a big thank you to everyone

   Your comments, calls, concerns really helped me today.
   We had a great fondue night last night, with tasty fondue and some ok wine along with some very good wine and a lot of desserts.
   Most important, Jackie is up and around, although she is a little black and blue in spots.
   And tonight she asked me to check her wound to be sure it wasn't all red and puffy.
   Those of you who know me, well.....
   After looking, I quickly  grabbed hold of the chair and steadied myself as my knees went weak and I got the "world is spinning rapidly" feeling.  It passed quickly.
   But she better not ask me again.  I don't want to press my luck.
   And explain this to me.  All winter my hands have been fine.  Today they are cracking around the tips and every time I touch something a couple of them hurt like hell.
   Typing is hard, and highly inaccurate.   I have ointment on them and a couple of bandages.   Thank heavens for spell check.
   Good night, and God bless.

oh geez......

This has been a very trying 48 hours

     Jackie has had a bit of trouble walking lately, so we put in a ramp.  Work was done Wednesday and Thursday, and it looks very nice.  Solid.  Substantial.
     Friday was a zoo day.
     I was literally 20 minutes from there when the phone rang.  Here's how the conversation went.
     Jackie:  I fell.  Here is MK.
     MK:   Well, she fell.  She hit her head and is bleeding.  We called 911.  Don't panic, don't rush, but you better come home.
     Don't rush entered my head.  I was on 294 almost at the Ogden exit.  So I got off, and decided to go to the bakery before I went home.
      Now that sounds cold, but we were having people over Saturday and the bakery was providing the desserts.
     I hit the bakery, then headed for home and got there not more than a couple of minutes after they brought her back from the hospital.
     Five staples in the back of her head.  Some bruising on her arms and upper body, which is showing up tonight.
     Thank God for friends.  Kevin and Jen, MK and Steve all pitched in to tend to her wound and call 911.  Emily was at work and couldn't leave, and John was in Sycamore.
     Bob, Judy, she is fine.  I told her to call you, but she hasn't.
     How did she fall?
     Picking up a tissue she dropped.
     I am going to sound like the frustrated parent, but she has been told time and time and time again if something falls on the floor....LEAVE  IT!
     Now for some self pity.  This is what MS does.  It robs a body of its ability to do simple tasks, like pick up a tissue, walk to a car, dance, or enjoy life.  It is a disease that affects you, your family, your friends and thank heavens we have people who care for us.
     We put in a ramp in the garage because walking has become too difficult for her.  She is fine in the house, but walking more than 50 feet is too difficult, too tiring, too hard.
     There are not many things in life I can say I truly hate.  But MS is one of them.
     It has robbed me of my wife.  It has robbed us of trips and visits we planned to make.  It has robbed us of freedom.
     There are days I have yelled at God, asking him why.  Why her.  Why me.  Why us.
     And there are days I find it difficult to cope.  I do cry a lot.   Not ashamed to admit it.  I miss my wife.  It's hard watching what she goes through.
     And I hope, yes pray, that some day there will be a cure.
     Life isn't fair.  I used to tell that to my students when they would complain.
I just didn't realize how unfair it can be.
     The saving grace in this is we have people who are there for us.
     And it's true...it's not easy being a friend of the Dickows.