A very wise person once told me, "Stop apologizing"
I'm sorry, but I can't!
I have done too many things wrong...and I have to apologize.
To my neighbors: All that paper blowing around last Thursday on recycling day? Mine!! My tub blew over. I raced (OK, as much as a 66 year old overweight guy can race) down the street and picked up as much as I could, but I know some landed in Creston. Maybe Dan and Linda found it!
To Packer fans: All those years I couldn't wait to rub it in when the Bears beat the Pack. I am sorry. Last night, no one called or texted or messaged me. Not Sherri, not Warren, not Bob, not Wendy .... they let me dwell in a dejected, despairing quiet created by a team I once liked. I can't Bear to watch them anymore. (The team, not the friends.)
To my neighbors: The screaming was not directed at you. My emotions got a little raw on the third first quarter touchdown.
To my wife: Just because.
To my children: I really am trying to clean up the stuff in the basement....but even if I live to 90, I can't get rid of it.
To my neighbors: Bingo, the trifecta!! I sprayed my natural deer repellent on plants tonight. I think it is made up of wolf piss and hot pepper sauce. It smells terrible. It's called Not Tonight Deer, and I bought it several years ago. I have not used it in several years. It comes in a powder that has to mix with water.
After I mixed it, the sprayer clogged and I had to empty it. I spilled in my garage, which now smells like a wolf or coyote or whatever relieved himself several times.
I also managed to spray myself, and I hope that is not the reason my arms, legs and chest are itching like crazy right now.
I don't remember if it is wolf urine or coyote urine, but I wonder how they collect it. Talk about a stinky job!
To all my friends I invited over for wine on the patio in 2013 and again in 2014: The patio is not done. I will invite you again in 2015. To say we are quite upset would be as off the mark as saying the Bears put up a fight Sunday night. Sad, that all my friends would fit on the patio, isnt it?
I think that does it.
I'm sorry if I missed anyone.
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