Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready?

I am gettting ready to get ready for Christmas

     Oh, it's not as simple and you'd think!
     Take the lights for outside.  They have to be checked, lines replaced, dead ones recycled.  (Yes, recycled.  There is a bin outside the fire department, I think, for burned out, useless strings of lights.)
     So I am getting ready to test the lights.
     Now that means I have to clean up the mess I parked in front of the 24 boxes of Christmas decorations we have.  And that is downsized.
     I started with the garland.  We have some lighted garland we bought in 2008 from a place in Rockford.  Quality stuff, made in China.  (Ok, Jackie, I won't start on that again.)  I know it was 2008 because I marked the boxes for date and store purchased.
     Since our porch is bigger than our hanging area at the old house, we bought two strands of garland from the same place in 2012, our first year in the new house.
     Got them home and discovered....wait for it.....they can't be plugged in end to end!  There is only a plug on one end.
     How in hell do you string garland if it can only be plugged in on one end?  You can't connect the ends and still have a plug!!
     So, that garland went on the end on both sides of the porch and our old garland went in the middle....I know that doesn't make sense.  It's a visual thing.
     Then half a string of garland burned out, so we wrapped white lights around it.
      Checking the garland lights......another string has gone half dark.
     Now, I know I can wrap new lights around it.  But I can also buy new garland that matches and fits end to end.  Just so happens there is a sale on that at a Rockford store this weekend.
     (Digression.  I hate shopping in Rockford because they are blocking our Chicago stations.  We should boycott all the merchants up there and just leave postcards in their stores saying No Rochelle Customers As Long As Chicago Stations are Blacked Out.  It will bring them to their knees.)
     And that's just the beginning.
     There was some discussion about decorating the 16 small bushes we have.  But I put a nix to that for this year....the little bushes are too, well, little!
     I do have some C-9 strands.  Those are the big multi colored lights.  I used them on the spruce tree at the old house.  No spruce tree, and if we get one, we won't need 19 strands of lights.  But we did at the old house.
     So, I decided to remove the lights from the garland so they can be recycled.  Did you know the lights are held on by little round clips that take about 40 minutes to completely remove?  I did not know that either.
    I saw a plastic twisty type tie, so I got my box cutter from upstairs.  But that would not work on the clips. So I had to go upstairs for a pliers.
     But one strand is done.  Now I just have to do the other, but now I know how to dismantle them.
     And the bonus is, I have two strands of good looking garland that don't have lights.  They can be reused or re purposed.
     To think, if I had done this over the summer, I could have had a garage sale and put the C-9 lights and the plain garland out for those who might want it.
     Now I have to save it till next summer, when I finally have that garage sale.
     Or just leave it with the other stuff that I never got around to getting rid of because I just think of a garage sale, but never have one.
    But when I do, there will be garland enough for anyone.   And I don't mean Judy!