Let the battle begin

I can't seem to find the right temperature

     I swear, I am going to wear out our thermostat.
     I am wearing shorts and a sweatshirt.  A heavy sweatshirt.  The house is set at 75 and I am freezing.  If it was set at 75 in the winter, I would be sweating.
     So tell me:  Why is it comfy at night at 63 degrees in the winter, but way too cold at 70 in the summer?
    Our thermostat should be named Otis......like the elevator, because it goes up an down so much.
     We have not found our comfort temp.  71 is too cold, 72 is too cold, 73 is too cold, 74 is too cold, 75 is to...hot!  Holy crap!  I must be having hot flashes!!
     The house stays nice until about 8....then it gets colder than a witch's behind on Halloween.  ( I did clean up the expression, just so you know.)  And we have not touched the thermostat.  The sun must really heat us up in the afternoon.  When it starts getting less sun, we cool down noticeably.
     We need a smart thermostat...one that reads our minds.  It should change at 6 a.m., 8 p.m., and again at 11 p.m......or maybe even sometime during the morning.
     And maybe it can brew a cup of tea and start the washing machine.
    One of the first tradesmen we met in Rochelle was an electrician named Turk...you may remember him.  He told us to set the thermostat where you are comfortable, don't worry about numbers because they are not that accurate.
     Problem is, I can't find that comfort zone.
     In the winter, I like sleeping in a cold room.  In the summer, I don't.  I can't explain it, no matter how many times someone points out my seasonal inconsistencies.
     In the summer, I like sleeping under a sheet.  In the winter, I like sleeping under a polar bear.  The heavier the blanket, the better.
     (Notice, please, I did not turn this into a frat boy rant about sleeping under a Scandinavian super model named Helga Cavorestacken, who has a weakness for pot bellied out of shape old guys.)
      Is it wrong to go outside to warm up?
     Maybe I will go out tonight and sleep on the porch.  No, it's not the temps.  Our bushes arrived today and I don't want anyone to steal them.  (As highly improbable as that is, a pick up truck did stop in front of the house about 15 minutes ago and just sat there with its lights on.  When I looked out, they left.  Coincidence??)
      It's going to be a long night.