On the go

 I have no idea how a bidet works

    I mean, I understand the basic concept.  You sit on the pot, do your business, and your personal area gets hit with a stream of either scalding hot or freezing cold water.  

    The idea is to get your hind end cleaner.  Plus, it reduces the use and disposal of toilet paper, so it has some environmental positives.

    Butt (get the pun??) once the water hits you and stops, what happens?  

    Do you pull your pants up onto a wet butt?  Do you use a paper towel to dry off?  Are there warm air driers that turn on?  

    Why are they so popular in other countries but not here?

    Finally, why am I so curious?

    The White Sox signed a Japanese player, Mirataka Murukami.  And I know his name s not spelled correctly.   Spell check must think me insane.

    He was a star in the Japanese league, hitting a lot of home runs but also striking out a  lot.

    In today's ball games, that is no longer a big issue.  Some home run hitters have high strike out numbers, but the homer offsets the K.

    Anyway, Murakkami asked for only 1 thing after he signed his contract.  He wanted a bidet in the clubhouse.  It was not a demand, just a request.

    So the Sox accommodated him, actually installing 5 bidets in the club house.  He should feel right at home. 

    I guess you could say I am bidet curious.  

    I could Google it, butt  (I did it again)  then I would have nothing to write about tonight except the old episodes of Twilight Zone I have been watching.

    Imagination....ain't it a funny thing?

Peace  and Love

that's fishy

I need to pay attention when ordering food 

    Last Friday I had a walleye dinner at Culver's and it was great!

    The order last week was not exactly correct.  I ordered a single butter burger for Jackie and they gave her (and charged me ) for a double.

    No big deal.

    The walleye dinner was great.  The fish was flaky with a wonderful coating.  And I had enough for 2 meals.

    Tonight I went and ordered the same thing:  single butter burger, walleye dinner, Cole slaw with the fish and a small fry.

    I got home and opened the feast and was really disappointed by the walleye.  It did not come close to what I had last week. 

    I bit into it and it did not even taste as good as last week for a reason.

    I looked at the tag and I got a cod dinner, not walleye.

    I know it was noisy in the place.  I asked the kid at the counter if they had a Philly cheese steak sandwich and he said they didn't have filled cheese steaks,  I repeated Philly, but they still did not have it.

    Of course, I did not get a receipt.  So I don't know if I was charged for the walleye or for the cod, or if there is even a difference.

    People I know ordered right after me and the kid said "With your senior discount....."

    Senior discount?  I'm a senior!  I did not get a discount!

    Turns out they asked, I did not.

    Next Friday:  Order walleye, ask for the order to be repeated, get the senior discount, get a printed receipt.

    I took advantage of the beautiful weather today to sand my patio chairs.  I have not treated them for a couple of years and the wood looks terrible.

    I love the furniture when it looks good, but kind of hate it when it doesn't.

   It will look good by the time I put it out in the spring.

Peace and Love

I have never seen a sign like this on a gas pump.  Am I breaking the law when I fill up my gas can for the lawn mower?  It's only 2 gallons.

No Beth, you are not in the way at all.

Can you tell the difference?

What did I do?

 I think I goofed

    Yesterday I was checking my  phone when a screen popped up that asked if I wanted my calls to be screened.  I hit the screen my calls option.

    I thought that meant caller ID, which I thought was strange because I already have caller ID.

    But evidently, based on a conversation I had with a friend tonight, my calls get screened!

    An automated message asks who is calling and what  the purpose is for the call.

    All of this was unknown to me until my friend D called tonight.

    I noticed I had 3 other calls that did not go through.  I did not recognize the numbers.

    So is this a good thing?

    I mean, maybe I have a computer with a virus!  Or a rich uncle who died and left me money! Or there is a really great offer on buying Medicare supplemental insurance or term life insurance for only 39 cents a day!

    I am now missing all. those offers.

    What makes it even more puzzling is I have no idea how to unscreen calls.

    So if you call my  cell, (or mobile, as they say across the pond)  be prepared to have a good reason to call otherwise the call may not go through.

    Since I am such a wiz with technology, I might not even be able to check to see who has called me during the day.

    Speaking of mobiles...... I was doing a crossword the other  and the clue was "able to be moved."

    It started with an m and was 6 letters, so I figured  mobile.

    The word fit the across clue and the down clues off that word were all correct except for one clue which was "wavy mark in Spanish."    

    I had bilde.  It made no sense.

    I checked the answers and the word I needed was motility, not mobility.  Seems to be used in science to tell whether an organism can move or not.  The down word was tilde, that weird accent mark common in Spanish.  (Yes, I Googled it.)

    I learn something new every day. 

    Like amend and emend.  

    Go ahead....check it out!

Peace and Love

dawn????

 I almost saw the sun rise today

    Our dog is nuts.

    Ever since Julia moved out last spring, Beth has slept in the den, or on the couch or by the front door.

    For the past couple of weeks, she has decided to sleep with us, much to Jackie's enjoyment.

    However, not all is well.

    There are times when I have to move her off Jackie's feet.

    There are times Beth snuggles between us and licks me.

    Then there are the times she has to go out.

    That's why I saw the first light of day today.

    I was sleeping soundly until 6:11, when somebody started barking.  It was not Jackie.

    So I let the dog out.  She stood on the sidewalk looking around for several minutes.  Eventually she went and took a leak, and then went back into our bed, nestling down on my pillows because she gets to bed before me.

    Then it is move her, have her move back, hide under my security blanket so she doesn't lick me, and try to get back to sleep.

    Funny thing is, I was not tired during the day today!

    And all day I thought of funny things that have happened, but tonight I am blank.

    We did have a hawk in the yard this week.  A big hawk.

    I caught a glimpse or him and I swear it had something dangling from its beak.  I hope it was one of the 6,703 ground squirrels in our back yard.

    Today Jackie and our helper saw him and said it just flew past and it was really big.  

    I just hope it brings some friends to decrease the ground squirrel population.

    That's all I got.

Peace and Love

no way

 There are some reality tv shows I can not watch

    If I am being truthful, I don't think. there are  many I would watch!

    But I could not especially watch (I know, clumsily written) Fear Factor.

    Just seeing the commercials for that show freak me out!

    In a tank with snakes?  Submerged in water?  Covered with spiders?  Watching the State of the Union?

    No way!!  All of that is just too frightening or sickening.

    Why do people do it?

    Is it for the challenge?  The fame?  The money?

    I don't even like walking into a dark room!  And noises in the night?  Petrify me!

    There's another show where people are marooned on an island and their family gets to vote them off if the danger is too great. 

    What if you come from a family that really doesn't like you and has a $10 mullion life insurance policy on you?  They would never vote that person off.  You would solve 2 problems if they didn't make it.

    Not that I am advocating that.  But it is possible. I mean anything is possible.

    Now I have held a snake, and a hissing cockroach.  I won't count the giant millipede because that did freak me out a little. 

    But holding one and having one crawl on your body are 2 different things.

    I will stick to  my type of reality shows:  making it through Walmart with a cart that veers right, or getting locked in a room with 5 types of pie and no fork.

    As horrifying as those are, I think I could handle it.

    Especially the pie.

Peace and Love

dog gone it

 I finally figured out how to get to bed early

    Last night I hit the hay at 10:30, and was pretty sure I fell asleep by 11.  I did not hear the cuckoo.

    But I did hear Dog Beth at 1:30 as she was barking like crazy at the front door.

    I got up, put on my slippers, grabbed my glasses, and headed to the door.

    I put her flashing red collar on her and got my heavy coat on because it seemed windy and cold.

    And it was.

    She wandered around the yard for what seemed like an hour!

    I had on my pajamas, which were little help with. the 50 mph winds that froze certain body parts.

    She sniffed here.  She sniffed there.  She sniffed everywhere.

    From one side of the yard to the other.  Sniff.  Sniff.   Sniff.

    Finally, after 3 toes became frostbite, she did her  duty and headed for the door.

    We went in, I took off her collar and she shot off for the bedroom.

    By the time I got there she was nestled down on my pillow, faking sleep.

    I moved her to the bottom of the bed, and climbed into bed, making sure my frozen body was fully covered by my security blanket.

    I had her out at 10 and she did nothing but stare across the street.

    But at 1:30, well, when the body has to go the body has to go.

    I just hope she decided to sleep all night tonight.

    I could use the rest.

    It could have been worse though.  We could live in New York or Boston.  In either case I might not have been able to leave the house.

Peace and Love

nada

 Today was, shall we say, interesting

    Watched the end of the hockey game and some of the cross country marathon.  Holy cow, those ladies have to be incredibly fit.  And the Team USA guy who lost some teeth but found the net, pretty cool.  

    I had 2 tasks today:  go to the store was one, finish cleaning the den was the other.

    Neither one got done.  Not only that, none of the dishes from today have been dealt with.

    I can't explain it, but about 2:30 I just started feeling sick.  For the next 4 hours or so, I was afraid to leave the house.  And I was too tired to work on my stacks.

    All I managed to do was sit on the couch and watch the closing ceremonies.  

    Jackie feels fine, it's just me.

    I just finished some soup and seem to be ok, time will tell.

    For some reason I did not enjoy the closing ceremonies as much s I thought I would.  Maybe it was my stomach distress, but I just was not into it.

    The fires in Kansas and Oklahoma are frightening.  I hope the fire fighters, residents and ranchers are all safe when this is over.  

    Meanwhile, southwestern France has had 35 straight days of rain and rivers are flooding.  

    Hoping for all of them to be safe too.

Peace and Love